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Messages By: ruralmomx3

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July 25, 2005, 6:49 am CDT

Marbles(sounds crazy,, just try it

My daughter turned 4 in April and she still won't pee in the potty! (she does poop in it so thank God for some miracles) It isn't that she isn't "aware" or can't control it. She just simply refuses to go. She holds it for as long as she can and then goes in her pants during transition (i.e. en route to the grocery store) or when she is upset with me. I recognize this as her way of controlling what she can and was given the advice (almost a year ago!) by her pediatrition to ignore it and she will eventually just start using it. I'm still waiting for that day and seeing no light at the end of the tunnel. Her teachers are concerned, I'm concerned and very frustrated. My daughter and I have had many discussions about this being social unacceptable, isn't it uncomfortable, etc., etc. SHe does recieve a popsicle for going but that has lost it's impact and I feel like I have no leverage left. I'm begining to consider therapy for her and have been worrying that she's been sexually abused! Anyone out there that can tell me I'm not alone or tell me what to do would be much appreciated. My patience is slipping! Frustraed in Seattle

Hi.  I was getting very frustrated with my daughter and actually put her back in pull ups just so I could give myself a break and catch up on the laundry.  My cousin tried this and I thought I had tried everything, but this one actually worked.

Get some marbles, find a nice container/jar to put them in and a plain container/tin to store them in.  When she is successful and goes on the toilet, give her a marble to put in the nice container(ours has a happy face on it, I found it at the dollor store).  If she has an accident, take a marble back out and put it in the plan container(ours is an old tin with a lid).  Within a couple of days, we had more marbles in the nice container and she really got excited. 

I think it works better than anything else because they can see the negative effect of having an accident, other than mom getting upset.    We did have a few bumps along the way, but that's to be expected.  I still leave the containers in the bathroom, but I don't mention it anymore.  I think it's probably safe for me to put them away completely.

Good luck.


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