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Messages By: jatslo

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January 23, 2007, 6:15 pm CST

Single stay at home dad

Quote From: supportingdad



I am so happy that you started posting on here, I to am a fellow stay at home dad.  I am very proud of you for the things you have done for your family.   I believe you will do a great job fathering your child.  My son is now 9 y.o. and we are planning on having another child in the next year or two, keeping the fingers crossed.  My wife would like to concentrate on her career and our family.    I just wanted everyone here to know there are more stay at home dads every day.  And hopefully the father figures will realize that we make a great parents and such a great influence on childrens lives.

Thank you for reading and Have a great day!

I am a stay at home unmarried dad with two children; one is nine and the other is three. My 9-year old was shaken by the baby sitter at six months old, or shortly after my girlfriends maternity leave.  She quit her job to care for him, and since I was making the most money, it made sense. I am actually a full time student and run four Internet businesses to try and supplement income. In fact, I am waiting to go to school now. To make a long story short, I ended up coming home to care for the children, because the Mother could not deal with it for physical and mental reasons.


Um, I was served custody papers last night, after rehabilitating my son for nine years with little or no help from her. In fact, she is never home, or hardly ever. I found out on Friday that she decided to break up, which is shortly after she purchased a new car. The new car has bankrupted her/us. She needs me to get a job, move out,  and pay child support for the children that I am in full physical care of. She provided for us financially, and we share in the decision making.


I have a little bit of money, from pell grants, and I own the children's car, so I can get a loan for the title. On Friday night she was out unitl 1 or 2 am, and was involved in a car accident, which was the third acident in less than a year. She Rolled her brand new car! Also because we are bankrupt, because of the car, she did not pay the car insurance. She has a totaled car with no car insurance.


I tried to get my name removed from the policy, so that I can, at least drive my handicapped son to specialists, which are located 30-miles away, with no success yet. We were a couple up until last Friday, as far as I knew. Sure we didn't get along. Anyway, I tried to rehabilitate my son for as long as I could, but now I need to get back to work as a single and seperated father who thought he was serving the best interest of his children, but is not so sure anymore.


Most people think that I am a dead beat dad who is using a handicapped child as an excuse not to work, but I have brought money into this household, through web sites, and throught the tuition reibursement that I receive from federal grants for school. Sure, the money I brought in is not enough to support a family, but it sure helped, and made it possible for me to stay at home.


The children's mother as been politically manuvering and building alliances in support of this day, and she has all the visibility to do it. For example, she works full-time for my parents, sister, and uncle, all of who have turned against me. I have nobody to consult with, and I am by myself with my children. I have contacted a lawyer, and have no money to give him. She might disconnect my phone, and internet services that I use for school, and business to prevent me from getting the advice that I need. I also found out that she is dating the guy who sold her the car, and now since she in without a car, he is coming here and making things very uncomfortable. I had to pack my kids in my car at 9 PM on Sunday night so they could spend time together. My 9-year old was to go to school in the morning, and has seizures if he is sleep deprived, ect..


I have to go to school now, but I will be back ...


I am so scared, this woman is going to get what she wants when she does not deserve them, and there is of course much more to share... She also abuses the children when she is here, she hit them and thumps them between the eyes, I have also found bruises on there bodies where she forcibly dragged them across the floor, or held them too tight, while leaving finger print bruises. I am protecting my children the best I can, but when I am gone, I cannot very well do that.


THe court convicted the baby sitter, yes; but she was a suspect, whereas I had a aliby. I was at work when my child was shaken. I can prove that I had not touched my baby for 12-hours or more, she had 30-minutes, and no aliby.


If there is anyone who can help, I sure could use some quickly ....


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