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Messages By: kittencat

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October 4, 2005, 4:49 pm CDT

Ready for a baby?

My husband an I have been together for four and a half years, married for two and a half.  He has been ready to have a baby forever, but I am not so sure I am ready.  Don't get me wrong, I really want children.  I am just worried that I will be a horrible mother.   


I don't have a lot of "maternal insticts".  I am worried that I won't know when the baby needs changed, or I won't feed it enough, or I won't hold it right, or feed it the right foods.  My husband says that all of this is normal, but I don't know.  I was never around a lot of babies growing up (I'm an only child) and to this day I have only ever even held one newborn, much less took care of one.  


Are my fears normal?  Should we have children?  Will everything fall into place?  Or should I hold off ...   

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October 4, 2005, 6:04 pm CDT

I was you ...

Quote From: evalucia

I don't know what to do anymore, my boyfriend of 7 years says he isn't in love with me anymore! He still loves me a great deal and our sexlife is going very good but........ he's not in love with me anymore. He fell in love with another girl but hasnt spoken to her since we decided to try and work it out. He even cried when I told him I couldnt be friends with him if we broke up! I just dont know what to do anymore or what to say! I pictured us getting married! He thought that also before he left for a 6 month internship abroad and when he came back it just wasnt the same!  

this is a cry for help, how do i find out if we can make it and how do i deal with this?????? 


Does anybody have any advice?? 


Eva from Holland 

Several years ago, I was in your shoes.  I was totally in love with my boyfriend.  He went away for a few weeks on vacation, came back and told me he had found someone else and was no longer in love with me.  Now, he wasn't seeing this other girl (I have no idea if he ever saw her again), but he wasn't in love with me.  Still, he wanted his "benefits".   


It is so hard to say no and push them away when you are so much in love ... but you HAVE to.  It is the best thing you will ever do in yur life.  Right now, you think you can work things out.  You think you can make him love you.  But it isn't that easy.  If he is so inconsiderate of your feeling that he would tell you he isn't in love with you, then try to sleep with you, he doesn't deserve you.  You deserve much better.  


I urge you to move on with you life ... without him.  It will be hard, but there is someone much better for you out there.  You will find them and you will be happy.   


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