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Topic : 06/02 "My Annoying Family"

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Created on : Friday, November 11, 2005, 05:35:34 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 11/18/05) Too many of us have that one family member whose rude, crude, obnoxious behavior gets under our skin and annoys us to death. Krista and Kim are sisters married to two brothers who they say are the most annoying husbands on the planet! They talk loudly, make inappropriate sexual comments and take pride in their bodily functions. See what happens when Dr. Phil turns the tables, and these guys get a taste of their own medicine. Then, Becky's daughter and sister say she has a mouth like a sailor and is always embarrassing them. Becky says she's just opinionated, honest and blunt. Will Becky learn to see their point of view and clean up her act? Talk about the show here.


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November 18, 2005, 9:02 am CST

Been There

My ex-husband thought the comments were fun, too. He embarrassed us both with inappropriate sexual comments in front of family, friends, co-workers. It is demeaning and aggressive when it invades every area of your life. And it definitely doesn't get what he wanted. After our divorce I had numerous people, including his superiors at work, ask me how I put up with his behavior. The man had once shown a very graphic porn scene to his bosses unsuspecting wife as a joke. This woman is usually the life of the party, but he deeply hurt her feelings. He has continued to make sexual and fart/belch and put down jokes. Our children want nothing to do with him because they are embarrassed and find it hurtful and disrespectful. I teach children social sensibility as part of my job. It's amazing how far a little bit of respect for the boundaries of self and others can go in making everyone's day go smoother.
November 18, 2005, 9:21 am CST

Difference is...

Quote From: gnmanning

I grew up in a household that was very rigid.  No TV, no totalphone, no soda, etc.  When I was in high school, I went to a friend's house for Easter.  She warned me about how her family was very embarrassing to her.  Her mom was full of energy and we could barely consume the food before she had the entire meal cleaned up.  Her two cousins started to playfight over the leftovers.  One of them took the loaf of bread (wrapped in paper, of course), put it in between her legs and yelled to her cousin, "Do you still want it now?"  I thought that this was hilarious and have enjoyed spending time with the family ever since.   

I'm actually no longer friends with the girl(long story), but I still have a relationship with her family.  Her mom refers to me as her other daughter.  She has to change who she is around her real daughter so she doesn't embarrass her.  She'll often comment that she couldn't do this or say this around her real daughter like she can in front of me.  I think it's a shame that people are worried about what strangers think of their family members' behavior instead of trying to understand where it comes from. 

It's always refreshing to me to spend time with these people.  They are full of life and they call it as they see it.  They have had a big role in who I've become (whether people like it or not).   I love to add shock value to any dull conversation, which I often do by sharing true stories about  my own wacky family.    

The difference is that you CAN be full of life without being rude, crude or without manners. 


I know many people who are "full of life" but also have manners, are respectful,  courteous, not rude, crude,  or obnoxious,  hurtful and not embarrasing. 


If you're out in public, having manners is  being mindful of those around you. 

November 18, 2005, 9:36 am CST

Ha ha!

My dad is the annoying one in the family. He has always singed songs about very embarassing topics or sang really badly on purpose in front of my friends, and would dance around like a fool in public just to embarass my mom and my sisters. And as far as being proud of his bodily god!!! But I can't deny that he cracks us all up. Even though we can get really mad at him for it sometimes, it has never failed to make us laugh at the same time. 
November 18, 2005, 9:48 am CST

When my mother beleive she is right!

What annoys me is when is when my mother thinks she is so right about something that she was not apart of but heard about by word of mouth. There are times when she gets told something and then we have a discussion about it and we correct her. She will make a big of it cuz she is so bullheaded and thinks she is right.
November 18, 2005, 10:03 am CST

I thought Becky was great!

Becky really made me laugh today!  I think she has a great attitude and a carefree spirit!  I think it's too bad her family let's her actions affect them.  I really think they should lighten up.  It sounds like she is full of life and just having fun!  


Does anyone else agree?? 

November 18, 2005, 10:07 am CST

Jealousy From Those Who Have Messed Up Their Lives Affects Us

My spouse has out performed his sister and I have outperformed my brother who is deceased.  I don't have to deal with him any longer because he is gone along with my deceased parents.  The squeaky wheel gets the attention though on both sides of our family.   


My M in Law is a bitter woman who feels that she was cheated as a child.  Her dad died when she was preschool age and they moved in with the Grandmother who wasn't happy to have them.  Her nature is contentious, rude, and blunt especially when she is unhappy.  She is usually unhappy because of the actions of her daughter and the daughter's children.  My spouse has referred to his sister as a "bone head".   He is nice.  He would only say that in secret but he has said it.  She has made numerous stupid choices and she is so rude.   The rudeness is the reason that I cringe in her presence.  When she got a divorce her rudeness and crudeness increased.  Her mother's contentiousness increased  too.  It spews on everyone in sight even though they are innocent bystanders.  It also spews more on the non blood relatives.   I am a non blood relative.    This woman was mean to her sweet highly regarded mother in law.  I watched it.  Her sweet M in L died and her ex son in law left her daughter.  I had always gotten along with her and considered myself lucky. I escaped the ugliness that she bestowed on the non blood relatives.   However when the M in L and the Son in Law left I was the next in line for the gun's aim.  I guess this woman needs a bad guy.  She has to direct her venom at someone I suppose so that she recreates her child hood.  Just guessing here.  ----Don't know what that principle is..      She prefers one of my chldren over the other and she now likes to bully me.   I don't let her get much reaction out of it though.  We have cut down our visits with her a lot.  She has even made false accusations that I prefer one child over the other.  She had the stupidity to let me hear  her telling her sister who was nice to me, that we let one child flip a coin more that the other one.  It was a lie.  She was telling what she believed or she was trying to upset me.  I don't know but I do know that she is getting less time with us.  She has gotten increasingly rude to me.  She is becoming unlady like-more unlady like.  I try to be decent the few times they have come to my home.  Luckily they live several hours away so I don't have to deal with this a lot.  I have had them in for Holiday dinners a few times.  However I will not ever do that again because of her behavior during the past visits.  She is blatantly rude,  and makes demeaning remarks.  She grew up poor.  Maybe she thinks people are still looking down on her.  My mom predicted that her ugly behavior would increase as she aged.  She is now over 80.   She has some bad manners too.  She used to feed her own family members before serving guests.  She can also be selfish.    Anyway back to the subject.  During one holiday meal at my home that I had slaved over.  She was telling me in my own home to put it on paper plate.  I politely told her no that I didn't mind washing dished.  She had the lack of manners to get bent out of shape over that.  She and her ugly daughter did not lift a finger to wash them.   The daughter is worse than her.  During her last visit she tried to bless me out when I was making small talk.   She was seething during the whole visit.  We had invited them down for a special event in our son's life.  I just don't look forward to spending time with her in her home.  When she is too old to host a holiday meal I will not be volunteering to do it.  The behavior has declined that much.  The sister is not on the ball enough to do it.    She is incredibly jealous of anyone who has not messed up her life.   During all holidays she and her kids are constantly trying to criitcize and make cuts.  We usually just ignore it.  I am the one that they pick on the most.  They also try to criticize the one child that this so called grandmother has said I favor.  I do suspect that she has spread this rumor.  So, mainly I watch them carefully to make sure that he isn't harmed.  That is my main reason for dropping the frequent contact.  Her husband came from a family that was a little better well bred.  I come from a family that is supposedly more well bred.   She must resent that.  I just don't see it.   Both dirt poor and very rich folks can all behave with good manners and with bad manners.   I avoid both economic ranges if they don't behave nicely. 

November 18, 2005, 11:32 am CST

Becky's just being real.

         kindred spirit,your great! Be who you are,tell it like it is.Have fun in life,it's way to short. Anyone who has things to say behind your back has something to say behind everyone's back.Being real,saying how you feel and enjoying life with a good sense of humor keep most of us off the Counselers couch.Who ever thinks you need to change,and you people know who you are,get the phone,call the Proctologist and get a sense of humor!                    
November 18, 2005, 11:58 am CST

Dr Phil Show.

Doctor Phil. I think that your show will be a hit today. But Annoying Family.  What are you thinking? I  

the idea of your show. I donot have a Annoying Family at all. See you today. Sincerley Your. Russe 

ll Vlaanderen.----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

November 18, 2005, 12:00 pm CST


Quote From: angelmomma

I really need some help making a decision.  My family has not been close for years and years.  My mom and dad divorced when I was 11 - I am now 49.  I stayed with my mom cause I was the youngest and my borther (4 years older) and my sister (2 years older) went with my dad.  I have seen or spoken with them a hand full of times in the last 30 some years.  I make contact with them 2 years ago - calling my father and brother and did not get a warm reception.  My dad said he would call me when he got back from Christmas with his step kids but have not heard from him in 2 years.  My brother's wife sent me a card that I got yesterday.  It said they would be in town from Iowa and "if I wanted to see them" I should call her brother.  I don't know what to do.  I don't want to be hurt and rejected again.  My brother has told me that I am not in the family and my sistem has told me that they do not consider me family, never have and never will.  Help - what do I do?  My husband says he will support me either way but I only have a couple of days to decide.  Anyone out there that can give me some advise?

My advice to you is yes, go and see him... but don't give him, or anyone else for that matter, the power to control your emotions or how you feel about yourself. If you don't take this one chance you have, you might regret it. Who knows when you might be able to see him again?  

Is there any way that you could call and speak to your brother, or his wife, before the visit?? If you could just explain... that you were only a child... and that you really wish he could accept you. Its really so unfair that these people get to reject you for no reason, however, I urge you to not allow their opinions to define who you are. Empower yourself!! I wish you the best! 

November 18, 2005, 12:20 pm CST

Lighten Up ladies

I can't believe that these women are complaining about their silly husbands.  I know so many men who are dull and *mature* and they are BORING!  These guys are not cheating on them, they love them tremendously and what is the problem. 


My husband and 2 sons top these guys...and when we all get together we laugh so hard it is wonderful.  GET OVER IT GIRLS...LOVE THESE GUYS AND HOPE THEY ALWAYS WANT TO LAUGH AND BE SILLY!!!! 

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