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Topic : 09/22 Are You a Racist?

Number of Replies: 206
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Created on : Friday, September 16, 2005, 04:33:40 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

Dr. Phil's first guest, Charlie, admits that he's a racist and it's tearing apart his family. He has stopped speaking with his daughter, Virginia, because she's pregnant with a biracial child. With the baby due any minute, will Charlie miss out on the joy that comes with a grandchild?  Then, Rujon says he's prejudiced against his own race because he "acts white." Should he be concerned about what other people think? Plus, Marla's daughter, Daphne, has been missing for six years, and her photo was never shown on the news. Marla is angry and says missing African-Americans are ignored by the media. Dr. Phil attempts to even the coverage by putting photos of missing women of color front and center. Join the discussion.


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September 22, 2005, 1:58 pm CDT


 what lies, dr phil!!!!!  There are more white people in the usa and so there are going to be more white people (numbers wise) doing everything!  BUT AS A PERCENTAGE OF THEIR POPULATION blacks are less educated and are on more tax paid for programs(welfare, headstart, prison,etc) that whites!!!!   For example  if there are 5 million whites and 1 million blacks (no, these are not exact #'s but I am sure dr phil "people" can get them) and 1million whites are on welfare programs and 500,000 blacks are too, it LOOKS LIKE there are more whites on welfare than blacks(BY SHEER NUMBERS).  If what dr phil says is true, then the same percentage of white and blacks should be on welfare and you would still get a higher number of whites on welfare.  BUT by PERCENTAGES, only 10% of the whites are on welfare and 50% of the blacks are on welfare.  Why is this?? blacks are only 14% of our population.  Very few asians are on any type of welfare.  The difference here is the culture they are brought up in.  But in the black community, welfare is a career choice.  To the asians, it brings shame to the family to beg for things you can provide yourself but are too lazy or think the government owes it to you.  How does the government owe you anything when you decided to have 6 kids by 6 different men by age 21???  Why is there no personal accountablity??  Why do these people get to make these choices(mistakes) at my taxpayer expense??  Why should I and my husband have to work 14hrs a day 6 days a week to pay for someone elses house, utilities, food, or medical care while they do nothing at all for it????  I have a hard enough time paying to support my own family.  If I can take responsibility for my house and kids financially, why can't they?? why doesn't the gov't discourage this? if you can;t afford your kids, you couldn't have had them in the first place!!!  SUPPORT your OWN kids, this includes getting 2 jobs if nessary.  I DID!!  we have NEVER recieved and handouts or gov't assistance.  I understand some people have a hard time in there lives and need temporary assistance, but not for a lifetime and for generations
September 22, 2005, 2:06 pm CDT

Rujon - a class act

I found Rujon to be one of the most well-spoken, intelligent-sounding men I've heard in quite a while! He seemed to be a class act - it was his "friend" Ty who sounded foolish. You are attractive, no matter what your race, if you can speak correctly, act in a professional and polite manner and are able to laugh at yourself. I don't know if he is single, but I was thinking what a great match would Rujon be with a lady like Condoleezza Rice!
Also, why didn't Dr. Phil lay into Ty like he did to Charlie? Why is it funny and cute to be rude about white people?
September 22, 2005, 2:08 pm CDT

Missing Women Nationwide

Dr Phil,there are missing men,women and children daily who do not get the type of coverage that they or their families deserve.   There has to be something more compelling than race to drive the 

story. Chandra Levy was having an affair with a United States Congressman.   Lacey Peterson was 

8 mos. pregnant and went missing on Christmas Eve.  Natalee Holloway's parents allowed her to 

go to an exotic foreign island for her senior trip..     As you said of your first guest being able to find 

an example to back up his theory, I can find two to disprove the myth that if you're a missing white 

woman,the media flocks to cover your story.   I can think of several stories in the past few years from my own rural,midwestern county that got NO attention statewide,let alone nationwide.   

  Dr Phil,you dropped the ball on this one by making it about race.  

September 22, 2005, 2:08 pm CDT

I'm so sorry!

Quote From: mzangela_1

I am going to have to get a copy of this episode. My father is a 100% racist and I've had it. I am 34 years old, I am white and my husband is black. I have a 10 year old daughter and a 1 year old son. My son was born with a congenital heart defect and had heart surgery the day he was born and 2 since. He is doing fine now. My father to this day, has not seen him and my mother watched my kids on New Year's Eve so my husband and I could go out to eat. My son was there for about 2 hours and my father stayed outside in the garage the whole time. The last time I spoke to my father was 2 months before I gave birth, to tell him that I was pregnant because he thought I was just getting fat, and his comment was "Why would you do a thing like that?". My mother will not stand up to him, so we are not welcome at there house and my mother is torn at the holidays. I can't even talk to him, because he won't allow me. I am afraid that we will go to our graves not speaking and that breaks my heart, but I can do no more where he is concerned....
My heart goes out to you! I hope that if you do get the tape and send it to your father that he will come to his senses. I also have to be realistic. Not many people who are racist will be able to just say, "Hey, you know, I will give those colored-folks a shot and eat dinner with them."  Charlie I think his name just an exceptional man! I hope that your father can be one, too. Best of Luck!
September 22, 2005, 2:08 pm CDT

09/22 Are You a Racist?

Quote From: pd_wife

 ummmmm amen to that
I am not racist but I have to agree black people and their sense of upbringing and work ethics are not as strong as other people. They play the race card to much. Yes, racism happens and yes their are people who discriminate against black people in the work place but don't you think the person who gets the job done the best and is most qualified should get the job not because of affirmative action saying the company has to hire so many minority. White people are now the minority in the United States. There are more Hispanic descendents here than white people. Shouldn't white people get to play affirmative action now since they are a minority. White people get just as discrimated against and no one wants to talk about it.
September 22, 2005, 2:16 pm CDT

09/22 Are You a Racist?

Quote From: jadalvjohn

I think you are indeed a racist and your trying to convince yourself more than anyone else that you are not. I'm not mad at you however, I am sad for you because in order to secure salvation you are going to have to confess that you are racist and ask GOD to forgive you in addition to other things. To make a long story short you are bound to have trouble at The Gate if you don't change and do it soon. I'm not upset with you but I hope that you will examine yourself as we all must do,  if you want to see GOD in peace. Black woman Memphis,TN
 I agree with you 1000000%.  you could not have said it better and those who disagree with you are either blacks on welfare or whites who have never been to the ghetto and have seen the way most blacks CHOOSE to live. Alot of whites who don't agree with you live in all white neighborhoods, make 100,000 a year and have their heads buried in the sand to avoid reality.. You can put 20 white kids and 20 blacks kids in the same school, same classroom, same teachers and check on them in 10yrs after graduation, see whos doing better.  I can make an educated guess and so can you.
 Also tired of hearing katrina victims getting on tv and saying how much better life is now with all the free housing, furniture, clothes, schools etc, due to the generosity of WHITES!!!!!!  When they were on there own in Louisana, they were living in shacks, ALREADY on welfare(free hand out by the whites) no car(thats why they say they didn't leave)etc.  Now they have all this brand new free stuff, they didn't have to work for it or repay any of it back and I have not heard ANY OF THEM refer to getting a JOB!!!!But I have hear several complaining about not having a car or enough furniture.Why did any of these people have RENTERS insurance??? When we were renting we had it and it cost about 30.00 a month.  About the price of a weave or having your finger nails done or a months worth of cell phone bill, which every welfare person seems to have.  How can a person on welfare that swears they can't afford food or housing for their kids but they can manage to have cell phones, expensive fake fingernails, weaves, and name brand shoes???
September 22, 2005, 2:19 pm CDT

I feel sorry for Rujon

I was amazed at the grief Rujon was getting from his own friend, Ty, for not being more "black." Is there one way to "be black"? Or "be white"? I felt very sorry that Ty, who claims to be his friend, would make him feel like less of a person for having certain hobbies or interests. Would Ty like to have someone telling him his views and interests are somehow not right because of his color? Fortunately, it looks like Rujon has a strong enough character to not let it change who he is.  


This situation, I think, is often reflected in today's young people. I've noticed how some African-American male teens give each other grief for actually succeeding in school and not getting in trouble, that they are an "Oreo" and "acting white" for getting good grades. African-American females, on the other hand, seem to be pulling ahead and going to college in greater numbers than their male counterparts. I wish I knew a solution to this problem because we need more successful African-American males to lead the way for the kids coming up now. 

September 22, 2005, 2:25 pm CDT


My heart broke as I sat listening to Marla tell her story about her sweet missing daughter, Daphne. I must say that until this show I had not even paid attention to race when it comes to a missing woman! I was shocked and appalled at my OWN inability to spot this in our society. I think racial prejudice in someone like Charlie and some of the other individuals on this board who make blanket statements about ALL persons in a given race is easy to see. Yet to NOT notice the LACK of COLOR when it comes to who gets attention and assistance in our society in a crisis like when a young woman is missing, makes us guilty of the sin of omission!!! 

My prayers are with Marla and ALL mothers, family members and of course the missing who have simply NOT been given voice until, now. My prayers are also with a nation with more assets and resources than any other nation on earth, that could allow this to happen! 

Making change starts with individuals, making a conscious choice to make this HISTORY in our nation. I do deeply regret that even one human being has gone missing and ignored by the media/us based on ANY kind of prejudice and/or other forms of stupidity. 

Marla, you and your sweet, delightful and wonderful daughter, Daphne are in my prayers, as are the rest of your family. I would like to thank you for the courage to make us ALL aware that pain has no color. 


September 22, 2005, 2:32 pm CDT

These posts are just killing me

I am just stunned at seeing post after post after post about how "The Blacks" are poor by choice, on welfare by choice, the most populous race in prision, how racist THEY are, all followed by "But *I* am not a racist!" 


While there are SOME blacks who have made bad choices, as have SOME whites, SOME Hispanics, and so on, the black population is the only one which came to this country by force, and was deliberately ripped from it's own culture and heritage-the effects of which are still painfully evident 400 years later-for proof just read these posts.   


I am married to a black man. We have a 5 year old. I don't know a single member of my husband's family, extended family, church membership or group of friends who has ever been in jail. I know of one who was on welfare, but that was after she was thrown into the street with two small kids by her partner. I DO know, however, that every single black person I know personally has a story of being somehow mistreated because of race. Whether it was the women who grabbed their purses in fear of an elderly black pastor in an elevator, the teenagers thrown against the wall and searched by police because they "fit the profile" of a group of muggers---some 5 miles away, mind you, and never mind these boys were 14 and 15 and dressed fro CHOIR, and the real muggers were in their 20's; whether it's my own, suit-wearing white collar husband being followed by security in the stores....there are dozens of examples. And that happens every day all over the country to blacks, for no other reason than they are black. 


Has there been progress? Yes. Are some black people responsible for their own bad situations? Yes. But the white population is the one in power, and that makes a very big difference in every thing from education to jobs to health care. 


I would love to think that my daughter's generation will truly be one od equality. But reading these posts I don't see it happening. Not when so many people are still out there, spouting,"I'm not a racist but, THOSE BLACKS..."  


Dr. Phil, I don't know if you get a chance in your busy life to read these boards, but I don't think you get through to anyone who really needed you to today. We have, as I see here, a VERY long way to go before racism is no longer a problem in this country. It hurts my heart to think that there are people out there who would see my daughter, in all her innocent beauty, and think "There goes another one of THEM," and assume she will end up in prison, on welfare or somehow do some wrong to white people.  


The really sad thing is, without ever seeing a program like this, without ever reading the hate spewed by some people, my daughter already knows white people are considered "better" in this society. Maybe it's that most of the anti-drug ads on  TV have black children in them. Maybe it's that the vast majority of people in pretty much any job, save the service ones that she sees are white...maybe it's that she can't find more than a handful of books about kids of color...I'm not certain, but she already knows that she has an uphill climb, and that makes me lose sleep at night. 



September 22, 2005, 2:34 pm CDT

Thank God for people like your husband

Quote From: pd_wife

 I am the wife of a police officer. A white Irish Catholic police officer. You want to see racism? Ride along with him one night. You will see it against him everytime he puts his badge on.  Lets see, the blacks, oh well he just shows up at their house for no reason and harrass them, nevermind that he has received a 911 call, that he MUST respond too, even though it's his 75th call of "baby momma drama".The whites, well they want to know why the police are going after the "real criminals, although he is there because some white person is commiting the crime. The mexicans, they yell that the only reason that immigration is being called is because they (the police) don't like, it's because they are here ILLEGALY. I could go on and on...But you know what? We don't..He leaves me every night to protect these same people day after day after day. Let me give you a little clue though, my husband doesn't care what color you are. Neither does any other officer. They are prejudiced agains ANYBODY who can't not conform to society's rules and laws. Against anybody who uses violence against them, or their neighbors in the community they have sworn to protect. If you shoot at them and try to kill them, beleive me the color of your skin is the furthest thing from their mind. Stopping the threat is the first! Now, all you liberals go ahead and blast me for this posting..Im ready for you, I've been hearing you people for 10 yrs bash my husband and his brothers and sisters. Just like Dr. Phil did today by insinuating that all police officers just pull over blacks because they can. So, go ahead, just know, that these same people whom you curse and bash, will still be there tonight, to watch out for you, protect you, and willing to die for you regardless of the hate that they are confronted with EVERYDAY by all of you.!!!!!
Thank you for your post.  I can not imagine the hatred that our peace officers see.  I thank God each and every day for every one of them, and also for their families.  Thank you for all that you do.
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