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Topic : 04/06 Ask Dr. Phil

Number of Replies: 220
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Created on : Friday, January 09, 2009, 02:34:14 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 01/16/09) It's Ask Dr. Phil day, and you won't believe the topics! First up, Jimmy, a 43-year-old musician, lives with his 20-year-old daughter, Morgan. He says many young ladies are attracted to him -- including Morgan’s friends. He prefers dating the young ladies, but Morgan says he should stick to women his own age. Should he change his relationship rules for his daughter? Next, Jessica says her husband is like the trash man, constantly throwing away the kids' games and shredding mail -- including a check he received for his birthday! Jessica says money is tight and wants to know how to curb her spouse’s urge to purge. Then, Anita and her husband, Kenny,  appeared on the Dr. Phil episode "'You're Not Hot Enough,'"  because Anita was overweight and Kenny made fun of her. Since the show, she has both lost and regained over 50 pounds and now wants gastric bypass surgery to take the weight off for good. Why is Kenny so opposed to the procedure? Does Dr. Phil think it's a good idea? And, Keyana says she wants to be adopted by a new mom. What does Dr. Phil think about her pursuit for new parents? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

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January 16, 2009, 1:31 pm CST

Jimmy and the younger girls

I would certainly agree that he shoud not be "dating" his daughters friends.  Can't help but wonder how he would feel if his 20 year old daughter was dating a 43 year old man and was sneaking him in through the window.  Besides, what kind of relationship can a 43 year old have with a 20 year old? What would they have in common t talk abou??  Maybe there is no conversation!!
 
January 16, 2009, 1:33 pm CST

Hmmm...


I was proud how Dr.Phil dealt with the situation involving the father who dates girls around his daughter's age. Dr. Phil was objective about it, and I agree that the man has the freedom to choose who he dates, even if the social norms are not satisfied. It is a good start that the father understands the compromises needed to be made with his daughter too, in order to preserve some sort of peace within their father-daughter relationship. I would just recommend that having relationships that are not serious delay finding a real one, and that he should consider prioritizing.
 
January 16, 2009, 1:35 pm CST

disagree

Quote From: mommyanne7

So true!  It is that something was missing in their childhood that the girl looks for from the man and that the man is looking for sex.  It not only messes up that girl but his daughter and her relationships, also.
I totally disagree with you, I'm 41 and my girlfriend is 19, both of her parents were married until her mom passed away and her dad has been there for her every step of the way. She was raised in a good home and goes to church every week. Its views like yours that try to stereotype all younger women that date older guys and that's not fair. Sure the sex may be great but that just comes with the relationship, I was approched by her, I didn't go looking for her but we fell in love. I have a 4 year old daughter and have thought about what I would do if my daughter came to me with this situation and I would have to let her make her own decision. Please just don't look at all couples the same because they're not.
 
January 16, 2009, 1:36 pm CST

lol ppl are freaks

who cares let the man do what he wants like the MAN OF THE SHOW SAID  hes an ADULT that can do what he wants as long as they are over 18 im 21 i seen women that were in their 40s and it was nothing lol and waking up to her childern and leaving the house in the morning
 
January 16, 2009, 1:36 pm CST

jimmy/morgan

I think jimmy was just being honest, i have a 23 old daughter I personally have not dated any 20s in a long time...But I do agree with jimmy I to have found lady's my own age have to much man hate ,scorned and mad a men...I just haven't been dating because all the ones I run into or either on med's or menopause..go jimmy....what about the cougars...the lady's that make a point to pick up  young men...
 
January 16, 2009, 1:40 pm CST

I agree

Quote From: pinkfrontier

It is so hard for a younger woman to find a man her age ready to be in a serious relationship and settle down. I think that if he is looking to settle down, younger women are not always a lost cause. Some younger girls are truely mature and could greatly love and appriciate the security and life experience that an older man may have.
I totally agree, although I'm 41 when I go out to dinner or to a party everyone thinks I'm 30-32 years old. I always attract 20 something. I've met some very mature 20 somethings and don't have a problem with younger women dating older guys, to be honest with you most guys need that long just to grow up themselves. When I was in my twenties I didn't want to settle down I just wanted to take over the world.
 
January 16, 2009, 1:43 pm CST

To Each Their Own

I honestly believe to each their own. I do disagree that weather you be man or woman you should not EVER date your child's friends or class mates. As long as the person is over 18 weather you are 25 or 45 then people should not have a problem. I say do what makes you happy as long as your not breaking any laws or hurting anyone.

 
January 16, 2009, 1:43 pm CST

is my dad wrong or my daughter

I personally date older guys and I have never found it odd or anything, but at the same time I have never dated a guy that has had children the same age as me because it is akward, even for me so me in my dating quest, one of my rules is that if He has kids that they be younger than me because I would feel bad for the children I have been in that situation where a parent has dated people my age and I dont want to go through it again nor do I want to put any one else through it but yeah if that is what he wants then go for it, just have respect for the daughter and her feelings

 
January 16, 2009, 1:44 pm CST

01/16 Ask Dr. Phil

Quote From: lauriechaussee

i have a comment about a 43 year old dating a 20 year old, it is not right, he is old enough to be her father, my step daughter is sleeping and dating a 43 year old and has been for 3 years she just turned 21 we tried to tell her after finding out 2 years ago that she was sleeping with him and that it is wrong and she could find much younger person.  she of course was being her age and didnt, listen, and know she isnt living with us and it is killing her father knowing that all this is happening, but has no control over what she does and who she sees, and dad and daughter unfortunatly dont have a relationship because of this and she wont give her dad the time of day but takes this guy over her dad. 

 

we have thought  for awhile she might be pregnant and she might have been. this could be a story but back to the show, i think it doesnt set a good example for these young unexperienced and nieve girls. 

concerned

laurie

I have a daughter who just turned 21 living with a 39 year old man (I use the term loosely) with an 19 year old daughter.  She can't see he's using her and taking her for  a free ride.  He lied to her twice about his age and she fell for it.  She lied to us about seeing him and life was so miserable we were somewhat relieved when she moved out to be with him.  She no longer contacts us except when she needs something and he has taken no steps to be a man and try to even explain that he cares about her. 

 

Unfortunately our 16 year old son is devestated his sister no longer even seems to care about him.  To make matters worse my mother is battling cancer and she hasn't even contacted her since she moved out 6 months ago.   It is a huge mess and our only saving grace is that she is seeing a counselor and hope that the 2 by 4 will soon hit her over the head and she comes to her senses.

 

Our daughter has no concept what she has done to our family and apparently doesn't even care.  I agree, this is no example to be showing young girls.  These men prey on these younger girls because women his age have had the life experiences to read between the lines.

 
January 16, 2009, 1:45 pm CST

Icky Icky you

Quote From: moondogg138

I appreciate a woman's perspective and I'm currently dating a 19 year old who is very mature for her age. I just turned 41 and she's ok with my age and I'm ok with hers. I'm young at heart and love to live lfe to the fullest. I hope you and your husband stay together forever! Good luck
 
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