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Topic : 05/27 What Do You Fear?

Number of Replies: 421
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Created on : Friday, October 17, 2008, 02:50:14 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 10/21/2008) Whether it’s the fear of spiders or the fear of dying, fears and phobias can steal your peace of mind and even dominate your life. Meet Kathleen, a mother of three, who says her entire world is built around more than 30 fears that include driving, flying, being alone and taking medication. Her life has gotten so out of control that her two teenagers dropped out of school to take care of her, and her 9-year-old is absent so often, she may follow in their footsteps. Kathleen, who wants to stop being a prisoner to her anxieties, faces many of her fears just to get to Los Angeles to see Dr. Phil. What’s at the root of her paralyzing phobias, and can she take back her life for the sake of her family? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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October 21, 2008, 10:11 am CDT

Need some fixn

I have been married for 3 years. All my husband wants is a partner to share his life with. I want to give him that but I don't know how. I have lied to him in the past and taken money from him. However, I am wanting to fix myself and be the person he needs and deserves. I am starting to be honest and open with him but I need to know how I can better myself even more. I am scared that if I don't change soon (like now) he will leave me thinking that he can never make me happy (which by the way he has). I need to know what and how I can get him to ever trust me again.
October 21, 2008, 10:40 am CDT


Quote From: fyoosha

Phobias are for those who have time for them...those of us who are suddenly  UN-employed, and terrified ,are being  ignored. I notice I'm so stressed, my typing looks like that of a 10-year-old....... After decades,of employment in education, and a "bread-and-butter"job, too-- I'm OUT  IN THE COLD,  invisible to the politicians, and to the media.....I don't care about the problems of millionaires or starlets!A lot of us are watching Dr. Phil for solace, suggestions, a panel of psychologists  perhaps?.....Something! Add Suze Orman to the mix and maybe this terrible Panic  that has gone unrecognized  can be addressed. We're  not all homeownders- a lot of us rent.....and have always been ok with  that. Forget "business as usual" at Dr. Phil- and for the next 17 whatever days ,help us COPE!  

Blessings. B. Ellen

Hi Ms Ellen,

I know that Phobias might be a big concern to you with all that seems most important to you right now and that is the unemployment you face and the election at hand.  But, in all reality sweetie these are your Phobias. You are wanting them addressed and I am very confident that Dr Phil will, however I too have been out of work for way too long as well. I put my application out at a place that was my field of education as my first choice and they were not hiring me as requesting without a state test for certification from local DWS that would tell them on paper that I remembered my highschool years of education. Which I explained to my Governor that my diplomas from highschool and college were no longe good? I am 52 years old and highschool was a long time ago. I wrote my Govenor and left things alone with him hoping that  he would see that this is not fare for us to miss out on employment because a state test was being testing for it's results. My livelihood was at stake here. I finally decided to quit worrying , I gave it over to God and put applications everywhwere  I could even online, etc. So, staying busy and letting the vehicles I set in motion and having faith that I did all that I could do-waiting game was now evident. I got a call yesterday from that job, remember the one that I wanted in the beginning that required an interview only with the "certificate from that state test", that was way too hard to take on the spot without intense studying prior to taking it? Wow, I was so excited. I do feel that if you plan, talk to the right people for change, have a little faith in them as the bible tells us. Please read and know I understand- Ecclesiastes 9:11 and llTimothy 4:7 and Psalm 91:5-7. You are a sweet dear christian it appears God loves and will prosper you if you set yourself appart from the world and just be His and believe. Blessings back at cha! Angeleyes

October 21, 2008, 11:08 am CDT

The state of our economy is very distressing

Quote From: mom418

A more untrue statement could not possibly be said as when you stated that "Phobias are for those who have time for them"  People who have phobias, especially those that are so extreme the rule your life don't only suffer from them because they have the time to do so.

That being said with the way the day and times, and economy are I'm sure there are not many people who are in the boat you are in.  One way or another this horrible downswing in the economy effects most everyone.


But to imply that those with phobias are getting undue attention and help, or are only afflicted because they have nothing better to do is an unfair statement.

I hope that things turn around for you.

I am so sorry for your situation and hope that things turn around for you very soon.  Nothing worse than having to worry about your job security.  Well there are things worse, but that is for another day.  I don't want to hurt your feelings, but you sincerely do not understand phobias. 


They come from a place deep within ones self no matter how busy or unbusy someone is.  For those of us that have them, we suffer deep pain every day of our lives.  In most cases, we cannot rise above them.  No matter what our situation is, and even if we had millions of dollars, good jobs, great relationships, happy homes, on and on, we would still have phobias, because those are not the reasons that we would find a cure within ourselves.


Phobias are a collection of life's experiences.  My feelings anyway.  Once the body knows how to have a panic attack, it awaits the brain to tell it that the situation it is in is threatening in some way.  That is the irrational part of this entire sickness.  Please do not be to judgemental.  One day I was fine, the next, I thought I was dieing.  That my dear, was my first panic attack, and my first trip to the hospital for this terrible emotional problem. 


Yes, she has let this problem take over her live, but to her this is very real.  That is what we call mental disorders and not temporary self involvement.  Thank you Dr. Phil for you careing attitude toward this woman that is in terrible distress.

October 21, 2008, 11:40 am CDT

10/21 What Do You Fear?

Quote From: wardjunefan

It's one to thing to compromise your own life from silly fears, but when you expect your kids to give up their education to babysit you that is crossing the line! I think Social Services should be involved in this situation. Dr. Phil is right, this woman is getting some payoff to this behavior. It's all in her head and the worst part is everyone is coddling and enableing her! Her husband needs to put his foot down and tell those kids to get back to school and tell his wife to grow up!
You are obviously someone who doesn't understand mental illness.  How insensitive you are.!!  Do you really think this person enjoys living this way??  Shame on you! 
October 21, 2008, 12:41 pm CDT

She got Dr. Phil's attention

Quote From: KathySue

You are obviously someone who doesn't understand mental illness.  How insensitive you are.!!  Do you really think this person enjoys living this way??  Shame on you! 

I think that is a big payoff, and I know a great deal about mental illness.   All the boohooing, and she flys first class.


My greatest fear is something happening to my daughter and grandson.  I know that if they were no longer here, there would be nothing on this earth that would keep me alive.  They are my life but they both have their own lives.   As hard as it is for me to let her live her own life, I do it.


If this woman loved her children, she would be getting the help she needs and be sure her kids are in school.  That is the truest sign of love.





October 21, 2008, 12:44 pm CDT

fear of germs

I dont understand how she can inspect a straw yet lve in a bedroom that is filthy.
October 21, 2008, 12:46 pm CDT

So true

Quote From: bluucaca

I feel for this lady but some things i think she is making up just to get attietion. Because if u see that her friend & husband are not running to her at  every second now so she has moved to her daughters now & they giving her everything she wants. And i don;t understand how she can clean the rooms that she nows people will see but not the rest of the house that is pure lazyness. I would like to see a follow-up show on her & see what ur doctors found out on the tests that there are going to do & see if she is for real on all her fears. I just feel real sorry for the daughters that had to drop out of school & have no ED because of her that is real selfish on her part. As a parent that is the farmost important thing for me for them to go to school & stay in school.

I believe that she makes it up to "get out" of doing so many things.  It is easy to say, "Im too sick to do this, and too sick to do that."


It easy to lay on the couch and cry (god knows, I do it), but its when I get up and get myself moving that I feel better.

October 21, 2008, 12:49 pm CDT

get real

Quote From: KathySue

You are obviously someone who doesn't understand mental illness.  How insensitive you are.!!  Do you really think this person enjoys living this way??  Shame on you! 
Yes to your question; does she enjoy this---yes she does! There is mental illness and people who are controling. She is one big controller. She wants to control her children and her husband. They are prisoners in their own home. It is ridiculous. These children are being abused. Someone should help them not her. She is a user and it has got out of control. I am sure all kinds of help is going to be offered to her and she will keep right on using her family just as she has for the last 21 years. Her husband is just as guilty by not getting those poor children out of there so they can have some kind of life . How  very sad for them. It is truly sickening.
October 21, 2008, 12:59 pm CDT

Where's the husband in all of this??

Why didn't the husband contribute to the discussion? How is he affected and what does he think? Why hasn't he tried to get her help? Why is he still there? Are they happily married? Can't imagine they're intimate.
October 21, 2008, 1:04 pm CDT

Get this lady a pill!!!

Obviously, this woman Kathleen has an extreme chemical imbalance thats causing severe anxiety.   I'd be exactly like her if it wasn't for anti-anxiety med, an SSRI such as prozac.   Why would anybody just expect her to just get over it ??
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