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Topic : 05/27 The Dr. Phil House: Brat Camp, Part 3

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Created on : Friday, May 23, 2008, 07:38:19 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
It’s the last day in The Dr. Phil House for four families struggling to tone down the chaos, fighting and unhappiness. Have you ever wanted to be a fly on the wall and listen to what your kids say about you? Well, the moms get that chance. They watch and listen behind a two-way mirror as their kids have a conversation with one of their peers. Don’t miss Wendy’s reaction when her son, Noah, opens up about his sister’s death. When Dr. Phil puts the kids to the task of cleaning up a filthy room, will the challenge be too much for them … or their parents? Next, Dr. Phil sits down with the mothers and the fathers separately for some no-nonsense parenting advice. If you’re a parent, you won’t want to miss this valuable lesson in parenting! Then, Dr. Phil helps the parents make the first step in creating a phenomenal family. Plus, how are these families doing now? Don’t miss the surprising update! And, are you looking for something fun for your kids this summer? Deborah Gibson has gone from teen pop sensation to an inspiring musical mentor. See how she makes deserving children’s dreams come true at her Camp Electric Youth! Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

Discuss your views on discipline here.

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May 27, 2008, 7:43 pm CDT

05/27 The Dr. Phil House: Brat Camp, Part 3

Noah is the biggest jerk to his mom. All the "my mom hits me!" all the time is a cry for attention. He wants people to feel sorry for him, and he feels better about himself by painting this horrible picture of his mother. If that was my child I could garuntee they'd be on a one way trip to military school. No one should talk to another person that way, let alone a son to mother! He's 10 or 11 years old, but he thinks he 20! I hate to break it to you Noah, but you a KID, not an adult, and the way you act and treat your mother doesnt make you look good, you're embarrassing yourself and its almost painful to watch.

May 27, 2008, 7:44 pm CDT

05/27 The Dr. Phil House: Brat Camp, Part 3

Quote From: ladiehawke

You have got to be kidding! Being overweight doesn't equal to being a doormat. What a gross generalization. None of those moms were morbidly obese either. one of those that anyone over a size 4 is fat???? Just wondering.
I agree with ladyhawk, what a gross generalization! I am way more "morbidly obese" than any of the moms in Brat Camp, and I teach kindergarten. Those children never run over me! Childen won't run over an adult from whom they get love, consistency, and respect. My class will go to the ends of the earth for me because they know I care.
May 27, 2008, 7:49 pm CDT

Not morbidly obese, Come on!

Quote From: bookgal

Do I see a pattern here with these moms? They are all very obese women.  I hope they address this problem, because (speaking from vast experience!) when one is morbidly obese, one tends to let nearly everyone walk all over them, kids included.

O.K. I did notice some weight issues, but I wouldn't say morbidly obese.  Not all of us have personal trainers and dieticians.  Also, there is a reason all those actors and actresses stay so skinny.  The camera tends to magnify everything.  Dr. Phil looks like a giant when next to most of his guests, but in fact he's just a tall man.  I was concentrating more on what the show was about. 



May 27, 2008, 7:50 pm CDT


Quote From: ladiehawke

You have got to be kidding! Being overweight doesn't equal to being a doormat. What a gross generalization. None of those moms were morbidly obese either. one of those that anyone over a size 4 is fat???? Just wondering.
I'm over a size 4. LOL!
May 27, 2008, 8:00 pm CDT


I feel that I can comment based on my own experience- I was Noah growing up in my relationship to my parents. I am no expert and maybe I had some underlying issues that caused me to be this way, but I also know this, I was nothing short of a BRAT. Maybe "the devil made me do it", but I truly regret treating my parents this way. I was a master manipulator. They worked very hard to give my brothers and I the best and showed us unconditional love.My siblings were not like I was growing up; they were respectful to my parents. Maybe Noah is wired wrong, hell, maybe I am wired wrong and that is why I acted this way. I have seen various therapist during my adult life and I have come to realize that my feelings came from anger and insecurity about how I felt about myself and I could not effectively express my feelings, but that is not a good reason for treating my parents like garbage. I admit I took pleasure in being a brat. Sad isn't it? I can just pray to God that I do not end up with kids that act the way I did when I was younger.
May 27, 2008, 8:01 pm CDT

What I Would Have Liked to See Noah's Mother Do

When Noah slapped his mother, I would have liked to see her firmly restrain his hands, get close to his face, look him directly in the eyes and say firmly (but not shouting), "Hitting is NOT allowed! I understand you are extremely frustrated with me right now. You are very angry! I am going to leave this room so we both can calm down.." Then she should have just calmly left the room. If Noah screams epithets or otherwise tries to reengage is mother as she is leaving the room, she should simply ignore it and comtinue walking. Then, she should not go back to Noah until he has been quiet for several minutes. If, after she goes back, he continues with a whiney tone, or continues to accuse her, she should calmly say, "I am going to leave again. I can see you are still angry with me. I love you."
May 27, 2008, 8:09 pm CDT

05/27 The Dr. Phil House: Brat Camp, Part 3

Quote From: taylorpero

I don't understand it, Noah said his mother beats him all the time, why hasn 't Dr. Phil reported her to CPS? She is very demeaning to him, and she always finds fault with him. Kids are like blank slates, they repeat what is said and done to them in the home. Wendy, if you're reading this, try to be more positive with your son.
 Noah lies about his mother beating him all the time. 

She was positive with her son and he tried to say she was starting a fight.  The kid is in his own world and wants the rest of the world to join his fantasy. 

May 27, 2008, 8:18 pm CDT

Noah is not being abused.

Quote From: amachina

Am I the only one who thinks that Noah might really be being abused? 


His mom's responses made me think she was guilty.  She said stuff like, "I don't recall doing that."  "CPS said I didn't abuse you." NOT  "I've never hit you in anger."  


Yep.  You're the only one.  Trust me, you would have seen it on the show.  True abusers don't care if the cameras are rolling.  An abusive person wouldn't have taken what Wendy took infront of millions of viewers, and not shown their abusive side.  In fact, I thought Wendy was really laid back about a lot of things, that I would have handled a little differently.  (For one thing, that phone would have been permanently taken away. Why does a 10 year-old need a phone? To call CPS on his mother when she won't let him do what he wants?) 


I worked 2 years in a drug rehabilitation center for women (especially young mothers) and 5 months in an all women's transitional jail unit. (I'll never work in a jail again. Completely wrong decision on my part.)   I don't remember a mother coming in those doors that weren't severly abusing their children.  The worst was knowing that these Moms were selling their children for drugs.  Did I mention we only took children 5 and under.  I couldn't begin to tell you the list of sexual diseases these children had. 


I remember this beautiful 2 year-old girl came in with a broken arm.  The mother's boyfriend threw the little girl upside the wall.  The arm had been broken for weeks. The mother was told to go to a specialist.   I just remember the Mom screaming at her kid, "All you are is trouble!  I hate you!  Look at the trouble you got me in you little Bitch!"  The mother went AWOL with her daughter.  I never saw either one again.  Trust me, I was in the trenches.  I don't think Wendy is abusive.   Noah was threatening Wendy with CPS.  It was a sick power game to him. 


I guess that's what really bothered me about Noah from the start.  I know how hard it is for children to come forward.  Even when the physical evidence is there, the child will lie.  I can only guess it's fear of the unknown.  I mean, if Mommy and Daddy would do this to me, what would a stranger do?  They're also afraid that they'll be placed back with their mother and/or father, which usually they are, and they know it will be really bad if they don't lie to CPS.  CPS is there to protect children that are really being hurt, and it's not cool to abuse the system.  I saw Noah just laughing about it, and it was like he was slapping me and everyone else in the face.

May 27, 2008, 8:24 pm CDT

Apologies for the misunderstanding...

Quote From: yoshiyoshi

I was wondering when someone would ask, "Do you have children?" Also known as, well if you don't have children, who are YOU to talk about how parents take care of their children. A common strawman argument.


I'm not answering you, because if I were to, the minute I might say I didn't have kids all the parents here would go "AHA!" and then lash out at me. It's happened before. Most of the parents here are too immature to handle that criticism can come from outside the mommy/daddy circle.

I am sorry you feel that way. I think my post was perfectly clear as to why I asked the questions I asked. Anybody who is a child advocate is to be admired in my book... regardless if they are a parent or not. I believe everyone can contribute to parenting forums- even if a person is not a parent. Whether or not a person is a parent has nothing to do with whether or not they can offer insight, advice or opinions. It also does not dictate whether or not they are right/wrong or if I agree/disagree.

Again, I meant nothing sinister by my questions, nor was it my intent to use any information you shared 'against you'.

May 27, 2008, 8:24 pm CDT

Unless and until someone has a child like Noah...

they have NO IDEA what it's like. I completely disagree iwth Dr. Phil when he attributes all the responsibility for these bratty kids on the parents. That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard! Children are born with a personality and certain behaviors that are just plain inate. It is not all on the parents - NO WAY!
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