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Topic : 01/15 Internet Mistakes

Number of Replies: 699
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Created on : Friday, January 11, 2008, 01:03:06 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Girls dancing on bars half-naked, passed out on the beach, hugging the porcelain … these are photos posted for all to see on the Web site Facebook, in a group called Thirty Reasons a Girl Should Call it a Night. These shocking and provocative pictures are supposedly submitted by the women in the photos themselves. The women say they love to have fun, and this is a way to bond with other girls just like them. But are there unforeseen consequences to letting the public behold you at your worst? Dr. Phil speaks with women on both sides of this debate. Jasmine is the moderator for the group Thirty Reasons and says, although she’s responsible for taking down questionable photos, she hasn’t found one yet! Amanda and Norma are incensed that women would degrade themselves in this way. Hear from the president of a company who uses Web sites like Facebook and MySpace to weed out potential employees. Could documenting your good time on the Internet become your biggest regret? Then, a teen who loves to drink says criticism of Thirty Reasons just reinforces the double standard of gender inequality. What do Dr. Phil and the teen’s mother think? Plus, a mayor’s sexy photo has her town’s residents outraged. And, meet a substitute teacher who says he was unfairly fired from his job two times for what’s on his MySpace page. Share your thoughts here.

Find out what happened on the show.

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January 15, 2008, 2:35 am CST

Stupidity isn't the worse of all possibilities

Well, it's basically their right to post that stuff, but I think doing so is pretty stupid and shortsighted.


It shows bad judgement, and I can't think of a single job where bad judgement is a plus.


Posting stuff like that on the net, is as dumb as giving  a potential boss the name of someone who will not give you a good recommendation. I take it these people wouldn't knowingly do that.


But, as I said in the message title, there is worse -- I would be far more concerned were I to find out a potential employee was involved in some kind of racist hate site.

January 15, 2008, 5:50 am CST

Consequences to Actions so BE CAREFUL

Kids do foolish things. Teens are just big kids. They think because it's fun that's it's ok. They don't stop to think about the impact of their actions on their future. That's so unfortunate.


If I were an employer, I would not hire ANYONE without first checking facebook and myspace, etc. And that's exactly what employers across the country are already doing! As an employer, why would I want to hire someone who doesn't know limits, thinks getting drunk is cool (immature and possible alcoholic???) and doesn't have self restraint nor self-respect???? I wouldn't. My employee represents my company and me. I need to be careful.


When ADULTS do the foolish, immature, irresponsible things that kids/teens do, that speaks volumes about them! They make their choices and the public has a right to make its choices (ie. not want them to represent them, not want to hire them, not want them around their children, etc). It may not always seem fair, but that's LIFE. Everyone has a right to make a choice.


Now with technology, people (kids and adults) need to be VERY CAREFUL before they act. They need to ask themselves (first) how their actions could possibly bite them in the butt!!!

January 15, 2008, 6:43 am CST

01/15 Internet Mistakes

 I cannot imagine what is going through those girls' heads when they post pictures of themselves passed out or throwing up.  Why does everyone seem to think that "self-expression" means "self-humiliation"?  Write a poem, learn to play the guitar, paint . . . do something productive, if you want to express yourselves!  Hugging the porcelain isn't expressing yourself--when you're that drunk you're completely vulnerable and the only "personality" you have is the alcohol.  There isn't even a "yourself" to express.

 * * * * * *

On the other hand, I disagree that the teacher should have been fired for his music.  I agree that he should not have been promoting his band at school, even to one select student, but I think it's ridiculous and completely biased that employers seem to feel they can not hire (or fire) anyone who doesn't fit every last point on their "ideal employee" list, even in areas that do not come up in their professional settings.  Who defines "edgy music", anyway?  I think Christian rock is pushing the limits of taste but I suspect that the blues, rockabilly, and roots country I listen to at home would be more likely to get someone fired (alcohol and drug references). 

I play and listen to a lot of music of which my straight-laced employer would not approve.  However, I do not play it at work (I am allowed to play music on my office computer, but I carefully select songs with no swearing and that do not have controversial lyrics, are not noisy or really twangy, etc.).  I am careful about my demeanor and language, and I dress conservatively.  I rarely stay out late on work nights and I never allow club time to interfere with work by showing up late the next morning, etc.  (I rarely drink, and never more than one drink, which helps a lot.)  I have never been reprimanded at work, at any of my jobs, and have always gotten good reviews.  My boss does not need to know about tattoos, etc.; nobody at work knows about them and they will never see them.

My boss and my job own me 40 hours a week; they should not get to dictate what I listen to or what I look like in my private life.  I don't humiliate myself, and I don't go around blabbing that I work for so-and-so in settings with which my boss might not want to be associated (and I never say specifically for whom I work unless there is good reason to, which is usually only in professional circumstances).  I do have a MySpace page.  There is nothing on it that I would consider particularly compromising (no pictures of me in my underwear).  It is not under my real name and my hometown, alma mater, and employer are not listed on it.  I mostly go there to keep track of the bands.  I occasionally post a somewhat irreverent blog entry and some of the bands on my Friends list are pretty raw.

On the other hand--do employers ever find out anything GOOD by accident?  Because if they could overlook the psychobilly bands on the Friends list, they would find out that I'm a very good photographer and that I'm great at Internet research.  All we ever hear about is the bad stuff.
January 15, 2008, 6:51 am CST

Underage Drinking

The problem that I have with this whole show is that these girls have no self respect for themselves nor their families.  Furthermore, they are admitely drinking underage, which is against the law in this country.

I believe charges should be filed against them as juveniles and drug and alcohol counseling should be mandatory with community service, fines and fees.

OR the alternative is to charge their parents and hold them accountable just as we do in truancy court.

There are no excuses for this type of behavior and where are the parents.

Department of Social Services should have been looking into this delinquency long before now because someone is buying or enabling this behavior by providing this alcohol to these children.


I think these kids are trying to have their 15 minutes of fame just like Paris Hilton and all the rest of the messed up hollywood kids that are so prevalant in the news.  TV portrays their lives as glamorous.  We really need to instill values at home and focus on self esteem issues at an early age.  They do not know how valuable a "good name" is.  When we leave this earth, the only thing we leave behind is a good name.





(Background - husband was head District Attorney for 9 years and is now in private criminal practice.

Has been an attorney for over 23 years and I would work for him.  We deal with juvenile delinquency as well).



January 15, 2008, 7:05 am CST

just a little outlook

  Well first of all I feel that teens us the computer more then what they should. Yes it is nice to have I am 27 and I didi all that drinking and stuff when I was younger but I never had a computer to post pictures when I was there age. I feel that a computer should be use for schooling for teens and for research. Yes I have pictures of where I was drinking but no I would never have them posted online cause that is not the way I want to be presented in life. I started parting when I was 15 which is wrong and I am proud to admit that I drink maybe 10 to 15 times a year now and most times its only 2 or 3 drinks when I do. I wish that when I was younger that I would have never of done that stuff cause my parting got in the way of a lot of things and how I acted like. I did drop out of school and last year I went back to school to get my GED in which I did get, now I would like to get into college so I can figure out where I want to be in life. Thats just something I which I would have done when I was younger and I do feel that it is wrong to post picture like they have.
January 15, 2008, 7:21 am CST

Posting Pictures On Myspace/Facebook

I have a profile on both Myspace and Facebook.  Both places have a warning about posting inappropriate pictures and nudity whether it is in pictures or videos, however, with millions of people on both sites, it's very difficult to police.  That's why the sites also request its users to report such abuse.  It will then be investigated and the users and profiles removed and banned.  IT DOES WORK!  I've had to use it myself because of friend requests that were porn related.


The substitute teacher is wrong with  the postings that he has on Myspace.  If he is in a position of working with children no matter what the age, then he has to police his actions.  These kids will look up to him and see that he is advocating nudity and foul language in his music then this must be OK for them.  If he wants to do his music, I believe he can do it without the vulgarity or inappropriate videos and still have the same effect .  There are many artists out there who do and enjoy immense success.



January 15, 2008, 7:34 am CST


i can say that i am 21 years old and even though i am a mother, i know that most girls my age drink and go out and party, but i can tell you from my perspective that i don't drink much and when i do that yes i drink and sometimes end up at the toliet. i know that i would never want a picture of me taken while i am being sick. in my opinon its the lowest point that we get to. we are weak and vulnerable at this point. i think that  "women" that are doing this may not have any respect for themselves or their families.
January 15, 2008, 7:34 am CST

I am sick and tired of

businesses and corporations who mainly have been ripping off the American people for the last decade or so thinking they can be the moral police of peoples lives outside of work.


Whether you think what those girls was wrong or right, it is none of any corporations business what you post online as long as you have not broken the law. Corporations and businesses break the law everyday and get away with it.


Instead of the morals of the person being hired, how about the morals of the person doing the hiring and the company they work for?

January 15, 2008, 7:34 am CST

bad behavior;weak excuses

I am so tired of niave parents blaming their child's bad behavior on ADHD.  It is like a blanket of denial!!! I work with a woman who blames all of her son's "poor judgement choices" on ADHD and depression- from skipping school, to flunking school, to setting things on fire, to drinking at school.  They are always he "victims". They are using a condition as an excuse. I really feel a lot of respect for those families out there who  with ADHD and work at helping their children become accountable functioning adults rather then a criminal statistic.  I know first hand how hard and diligent the work is, but after all, our children are are legacy.  
January 15, 2008, 7:35 am CST

When to be Ashamed

Re:  Today's show about the teens getting drunk and posting pictures.........................In my own personal opinion (although I'm old and no one really wants to hear my opinion) one, including these young people should post of do anything that they would be ashamed for God to see.

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