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Topic : 04/07 Will Fights

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Created on : Thursday, November 08, 2007, 07:36:51 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 11/13/07) Has an inheritance that seemed at first like a stroke of good fortune become a dividing force in your family? Meet four sisters bitterly fighting over their aunt’s inheritance. Virginia's original will divided her estate four ways: Pat, Linda and Barbara would each receive $10,000 and Carol, the youngest, would get the remainder of the trust -- approximately $400,000. But the inheritance was split six ways to include Linda’s two kids after Aunt Virginia went to live with Linda. Barbara says she can’t imagine why her aunt would change the trust unless Linda manipulated her. Does Barbara have a case against her sister, or is she just being the family troublemaker? Their mother, Fran, drops a bombshell about the real reason the will was changed. Then, Sondra says she and her husband, Patrick, fight constantly since they blew his $100,000 inheritance in less than a year. After purchasing five new cars, a new TV and furniture, they can’t afford to pay for their daughter’s college tuition. How can this couple end the battle over the buck? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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April 7, 2008, 2:43 pm CDT

04/07 Will Fights

Quote From: baileycourvill

Thank you Sondra, but thats ok I have learned alot from my experiences. And well I must say I am very blessed. Our family (about 20 of us), stuck together the whole time as team players. And all of us helped each other out and about a year after we were all back on our feet. I wouldn't take this experience back. It hurt, but it made us all better people. And I am greatful to America for the Outstanding support they gave. You guys are in my thoughts and prayers.
Thoughts and prayers are fine, but they had much more than many folks, and they blew it.
April 7, 2008, 2:46 pm CDT

I can definitely agree with you

Quote From: erh5467

Lesson learned, when a person excepects you to take care of them, and they do not, is a reason to change will.  Those girls should have kept in contact with thier Aunt, instead of letting one sister do it.  maybe then the aunt would not have been influnced by one. 

I know that i have changed my will several times as things change in my life and thiers.  The last few years of a person's life is very stressful, so the person doing the care taking should be given compastion, or every one pitch in and share the work'


I have been in this very situation.  I cared for an elderly aunt who had no children.  My aunt had 11 other nieces and nephews who did very little or nothing for her in her last days.  Some hadn't seen or talked to her most of their adult lives while 3 or 4 of us kept in touch and cared for her.  But her Will was made at a younger age when she loved us all.  But in her later days when she was lonely and saw nobody and saw that the others didn't care about her, she wanted to change her Will to eliminate them and leave her money to the ones who helped her.  She told me this many times and I know she meant it but she did have dimentia and couldn't do it on her own.  No way was I going to take her to do this as I would then be accused of manipulating her.  So the others did get their share of her money but I spent time with her and knew she loved me and have some good memories.  They have money and I am sure it brings them pleasure but I also hope they had a twinge of guilt knowing they never called or wrote to her over the years.
April 7, 2008, 2:48 pm CDT

They will continue to live the same way

Quote From: adnohr

    My heart goes out to Patrick and Sondra,I know exactuly how  Patrick feels,I found myself in a simular situation a few years ago,and it still hurts.I have decided to take Dr.Phil's advice and move on.I hope Dr.Phil checks back up with them in the future,I  would love to know how things turn out for them,so maybe it could help people like me also.     
Your heart should go out to the people that lost money from them.
April 7, 2008, 2:49 pm CDT

04/07 Will Fights

Quote From: freddias

Dr. Phil,

My father passed away in November of 2006.  We had a family business that I had left 10 years earlier, due to conflicts with my brother.  It seemed that everything has resolved and just before my Dad passed away he wanted me to move from Florida, back to Penna. to be a part of the business.  My brother and sister have been in charge of the business, but my DAD always kept his CEO status.  I went back to work at the business, and only after 3 months my father passed away.  In his will he left the business totally to my brother and sister, and I was supposed to receive cash inheritance instead of being an owner of the business.  My siblings are so jealous that I am supposed to receive the cash, that they have instructed my mother not to give me a dime, until she passes away, and if she needs any money to live on, she can use my inheritance.  My dad left her very well off, but being on a disability I had asked for some money to get by and my brother and sister said absolutely no way.  I can't understand how they can inherit the family business, live on a very comfortable salary, with all kinds of benefits, and they know that I don't even make $25,000 a year working part time and with my social security. 

You need to hire a lawyer. Your family has no right to withhold your inheritance from you.
April 7, 2008, 2:51 pm CDT

Greedy vultures

That's what people become.  Fighting over money and 'things' is just not worth it. 

The aunt did the right thing to divide the money equally instead of giving the younger sister more.  That makes no sense.  Did the younger sister manipulate her int he first place to get more than the others? 


Where were the other sisters when it was time to take care of the aunt?  No where to be found, just waiting int he wings for their money. 

April 7, 2008, 2:59 pm CDT

where there is a will there is not a way!

My father died in Dec. 2006, leaving a will that put me as the executor of the will, my older brother as the next in charge if I were unable to be the executor.  My Dad had been sick on and off for the past 3 years.  Well, he met this person(I can not call her a woman because she is less than that) at his church in Oct 2005.  She moved in w/him in Jan of 2006 and they were married in April of 2006.  Did I mention that he was 78 and she was 18 years his junior?  She pretends to be an evanlansgelist. She quit her job at a bar in Sept 2006.  Attempted to move her alcoholic sister in but my father protested this.  My Dad's health went down a lot after marrying this person.


In Nov.2006 he had open heart surgery at her doctor's request.  Three weeks later he suffered a heart attack while she was driving.  He was in a coma until he died.  While in the coma the wife tried to band my brother,sister, nieces and me from seeing him.  She wanted him to stay hooked up to machines when Dad had made it clear to everyone that he did not want that to happen.  I had to go to his lawyer and get a copy of the will to get them to turn the machines off and respect my father's wishes.  the funeral was a joke, with our family having to sit behind her family(many who did not even know him) at the church.


She moved in her sister and brother, both drunks who do not work.  The will was probated and I was appointed executor.  She did not contest the will.  However, after being married to him for 7 months she is entitled to 1/3 of his estate.  She has destroyed and removed property from the house without telling me or my brother.  She has lied repeatedly about bank accounts, coin collection, and photos. 


My Dad trusted that she would take whatever she brought into the marriage with her and he would take his.  No, the wife feels she is entitled to everything and we his children get nothing.  This has been in court since last year and it continues.


PLEASE Advise your love one to get a prenupt.  A will does not mean that the wife of 8 months can't do whatever she pleases.

April 7, 2008, 3:05 pm CDT

Your sister is an angel

Quote From: shirlc

After seeing the 4 sisters fueding over inheritance today..........I am sure Aunt Virginia wishes she had spent it herself!  I wish she had too.


My sister recently showed me total LOVE after the death of our mother., and I am so blessed to have her as family.

In the 1970s my parents made wills and the conclusion is that their 2 daughters would share & share alike.  Over the years my Dad died and my mother got excessively nasty and suffered greatly from dementia.  My sister stood by Mom at her worst and kept visiting when my Mother was insulting and ornery.

I did not......I knew that Mom had good care and stayed away to avoid upsetting her & me.


At the time of my mother's death, our lawyer informed me that Mom had left everything to my sister.

I was very hurt and upset with my mother for doing that and I still am. The lawyer assured me that we could get it fixed up in Court because of her dementia.   But my sis made it OK & offered to split 50/50 as it was when my parents were in their right minds.  I LOVE MY SISTER SO MUCH and I realized that more than every after your show today.  Her love survives money, dementia, and so many things that can destroy a family.  Thanks for reminding me of my good fortune, my only , loving, sister.

You are very lucky your sister is a loving person and holds no grudges against you for abandoning her. 


I just went thru this same situation and I will tell you how it felt from the other side of this.  It was all left on my shoulders.  It wasn't any more pleasant for me to be there than the others who made the choice to stay away.  Knowing someone has dementia and doesn't really know what they are saying does not give people an excuse to stay away. 


My MIL went thru the same difficult nasty personality change and it was not fun for any of us but one family member did justify her staying away by saying she refused to be treated like that.  MIL had no money but she did have an insurance policy naming my SIL as beneficiary.  Of course she needed the money and she kept it all.  It was typical of MIL to give everything to SIL so no surprise there, but we would never fight over it.  In fact we paid for most things while the others received everything.  It all comes down to is it worht fighting over or do you want to keep peace for your mother's sake?

April 7, 2008, 3:19 pm CDT


   I would be so embaressed to be fighting over the money, Why not let her rest in peace.

 They all got what the grandmother felt was fair.  far as the family goes, there are some

 uncareing people. If this was my gradmother I would rather have her then not to. And I

nothing gave to me and I8 know I will never, but that is ok. These sisters have a lot of

 other issues. This is sad.

April 7, 2008, 3:43 pm CDT



      Do these people even have the remote idea how lucky they are, there are

 people that never get that adantage, it makes me sick when people fight over

 the money, and are not greatful that they even got a penny. But karma is the

 root to all evils, and I live by karma every day, because it comes back to you

 ten times more. None of these people even say any thing about if they even

 cared about the family member who left them this money, in fact it sounds

 like it makes more problems in the long run.

April 7, 2008, 3:58 pm CDT

easy just don't die

    my mom died 10 years ago the aug. i sat in horor as my 3 other sibblings pushed hit scratched scream and just plain went nuts over our moms things...she really had next to nothering but things us kids had given her......i asked my dad to please just have some one not in the family to handle his for me...i've told my kids i'm not going to die ,,so there is nothing to divide!
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