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Topic : Stress at Work

Number of Replies: 237
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Thursday, July 07, 2005, 09:24:47 am
Author : dataimport
How do you manage stress in the workplace? How do you leave the office at the office and manage a stress-free home life? Join us to share strategies.

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May 18, 2007, 4:53 pm CDT


Uh.  What can I even say about stress.  My home is my oasis because my job is one crisis after another.  I teach first grade to "at risk" students.  I know that first grade doesn't seem like too much of a big deal, but since No Child Left Behind was put into law, my job is not an enjoyable one.  In addition, 6-7 year old just aren't what most people think they are.  They are very grown up and can be extremely unchild like.  My bosses are a couple of gals on some serious power trips too.  It can be really toxic.  I have tried to transfer out, believe me it is harder than you think.  Schools like mine have trouble getting and keeping teachers.  They have ways of preventing the hard working ones from crossing the fence to greener pastures.  I try applying to other school districts, but I do not have any serious connections.  I have been at this particular school for 6 years and I am one of the veteran teachers.  I ask myself if I should just hang in there and deal with it.  I am good at what I do and I can do it.  Is happiness everything?  Other places that would hire me offer me a huge paycut and I am the primary breadwinner in the family so I can't do that.  I just think that God wants me where I am and I should just keep on truckin.   So I keep on truckin, but the stress is unbearable.  I am so excited for the summer, but I often wonder about the damage I am doing to myself during the school year as a result of stress.
June 15, 2007, 12:32 pm CDT


The other day I was at Blockbuster renting season 1 of the Dr. Phil show.  When at the till, the cashier told me that he hated his job.  I screamed “ARE YOU NUTS! YOU NEED TO GET REAL!”  He then told me “Buddy… back off, I have been having a bad day.”  So I then asked him “tell me what the problem is?”  SO in anger, he told me what the problem was.  I told him in a gentle and caring voice “my friend, you need to get real, you need to love your job.  You have 2 kids and a wife to support.  In my opinion, after work you should go straight to the book store and buy a copy of Dr. Phil’s book FAMILY FIRST.  I think that will help you out greatly!  He then started crying and said thank you my dear boy and he gave me a power hug.  I then left blockbuster with my copy of Dr. Phil season one looking happier then ever…  IN PHIL WE TRUST!

June 22, 2007, 3:37 pm CDT

Stressful interaction with boss

I was hired as a Municipal Accounting Assistant last fall. We are county-level government and provide services to several small towns. There are four of us on the team, two accountants and two assistants. I have a master's in corporate accounting and my boss has been encouraging, providing extra municipal training, and has been telling me she has great hopes of me achieving my municipal accounting certification and being responsible for towns of my own. As the new fiscal year starts July 1st, the plan was for me to double my hours. She said July would be even busier with fiscal-year-end, so I arranged childcare for my three children, rescheduled another part-time job, and was all set to meet this new challenge. Great, right?


The boss finally hammered out the summer schedule and surprise - I was left out of all the extra July work, but would start my new schedule in August. OK, I was surprised after the build up about July, but on the bright side, I could do more stuff with the kids in July.


Then one of the new towns we were supposed to start providing services to had a problem creep up so they wouldn't be able to hire us after all. The boss called and said not only was I losing the hours I would have had for that town, one of the other accountants would be taking my hours from another town so she could maintain a full work week. So I wouldn't be getting any extra hours after all, but I wouldn't be doing less than I have been. I was very disappointed, but understood that I was low man on the totem pole and it wasn't a reflection of my work, just how much work was now available. 


But when she emailed me the schedule, I was down to half of what I am doing now.


I ran the whole gamut from disbelief, to anger, to apathy. I told myself all things happen for a reason, that I'm not so financially strapped that I needed the extra hours, that maybe I didn't really want to do this as a career, that it's good to have the time to spend with the kids this summer and I can look for more work in the fall if I need it...yadda yadda.


So I replied to the email saying I was surprised and disappointed by the schedule but I understood why it was that way, I wasn't mad at anyone, and I'd be fine with whatever happened. I felt better. I felt like I took a little control back from a situation I had no control over.


So when the boss called and asked if I'd come in to discuss the schedule today, I didn't know what to expect. More hours, less, none at all, different days? What she said was "I still don't think you understand the schedule." And she proceeded to explain everyone's new schedule and say they had all taken some reduction in hours and I actually lost less than the others. She still hoped I'd be a full accountant on the team someday - that day was just a little further off now. And she had planned on giving me a token raise, which they could no longer do, but she had wanted to.


I'm afraid I didn't give her the reaction she wanted. In hindsight I think she actually wanted me to thank her. Instead I said the other's shouldn't have to take any cuts - she could give them the rest of my hours if she wanted, I'd be okay. I probably just shot myself in the foot. I had been eager and willing and thankful for her confidence and expectation of advancement in the past, and she probably needed to hear that I was as gung-ho as ever, but I'm not. I'd rather take it one day at a time, then believe what she says, get my hopes up, then get let down again.


I'm like that in many other areas of my life as well. It makes sense to me, but I feel out of sync with the rest of the world. My boss was clearly confused by my email in addition to our in-person talk today. Is the way I view the world so off from the way everyone else functions?


Stress at work = not having control.

Relief = finding ways to get some control back.

Stress = questioning yourself when others don't understand you!



July 7, 2007, 6:56 am CDT

Just Need To Vent (again)!

I've written before about my stressfull work-situation, it was a while ago but now I feel that I have to vent again and get some things off my chest.

I currently work two jobs, both of them are in health care; I'm a personal carer and a carer for the elderly, I work nightshifts and dayshifts in both jobs and I just barely make ends meet at the end of the month. I've got backpains, can't sleep at night and when I do fall asleep I sleep untill noon. Everyone I know, freinds and family, have vacations this time of year, and they all want my and my hubby to come visit them, or they want to come visit us. Either way we have to spend more money than usual on either travels or guest-keeping. And don't even get me started on the housekeeping! (On top of it all my hubby has started up a redecorating project around the livingroom.)


Quite honestly I came here today to vent about my hubby. As I said I'm working two jobs and am as we speak looking for a third. I found a couple of jobs online and showed them to him (he's supposed to be looking for a job, he's inlisted with the employment office but he's not doing anything so they'll probably unlist him very soon and he'll get no more help) but he just went "nah, I don't wanna work in this or that".

I wanted to scream at him that I didn't want to work at any of the jobs I do now either but we are really not in a possission where we can be picky! My jobs aren't even steady, I'm payed by the hour and I have to take whatever hours I can get or I'll get nothing, I can't do anything of the things I want to do because I have to keep my calender open for whenever there's an opportunity to work! And he says "nah, I don't wanna"!

I know I know, I should really push him, but then he gets mad at me and feel like I'm dogging on him and he'll go "you think I'm lazy, I'm useless, you hate me for not having a job, I'm sorry I'm so useless baby, you hate me don't you" and I can't stand that, I get mad and instead of handeling the situation with cool and logic I just yell back at him.

So I'd rather sob a bit in secret, get myself together and go look for that third job, playing the victim to myself - much rather than having to deal with him playing the victim on me!


But ARGH! It would be so effing nice not to have to carry us both financially, not to have that weight on my sholders every hour of every day. I am really so soo tired...!

July 9, 2007, 9:24 am CDT

Find A Happy Place? Not here!

 I work in a beautiful environment! Birds, butterflies, animals, a museum, and gardens. Should be a dream job, right? It's the 9th ring of hell! I've never seen so many unhappy people and I have joined them in their unhappiness. Today, I am going to a therapist to help with the stress. I'm overworked, under paid and our boss is a bully who makes sexual references to coworkers and about our female guests. I've already met with the CEO, human resources, and a meeting with the boss and all of the aforementioned. I have been labeled a problem because I have encouraged the younger ladies (my coworkers) not to let him get away with the way he speaks to them. I'm 56 and this was going to be my last job before I retire but I'm tired from the fight!

My boss may be happy one minute then barking mad the next. The smallest things seem to set him off. For example, a coworker came into his office (where one must go to get change for registers) and he was livid! He even came out of his office later to continue chiding the young woman for disturbing him.
Many times when I have had to go into the office he's on the computer looking at websites that have nothing whatsoever to do with work, like looking at pictures of Paris Hilton. It really makes me angry! He is salaried and I make less than $8.00 per hour but I do get benefits and that's what they keep saying when they don't give any of us a raise. Let me say that I am a worker known for going above and beyond at every opportunity!

I love the part of my job that involves greeting the guests and showing exhibits but I have fantasies just like the ones in the movie 9 to 5! This man is getting away with so many things that should not be tolerated but I was told to let the past go (by our administrators) and give him another chance.

Jobs with benefits in our town are almost non-existent and the pay around here is mainly minimum wage. I have to keep working. My husband is retired and receives social security and we were wiped out financially by his bypass surgery which happened one month before he got his social security.  We live paycheck to paycheck and are being sued for what we owed before the surgery. We couldn't even afford to file bankruptcy so we are trying to deal with the debts.
In other words I have to work.

Right now, I have to pretend that everything is fine at work so I don't lose my job but I'm losing my dignity! My husband is a good man who deserves much better than what happened to him. It really irks me to go to work and put up with the bully boss who seems to have enough of everything and mistreating those of us who need to keep working!

I've contacted the labor dept. but I don't have an appointment until October! What can I do? I've tried the resources that should be there to help and I feel that all I did was make a deal with the devil so I can keep working. Any suggestions or ideas would be welcome!

July 17, 2007, 8:54 pm CDT

I had been treat unfairly at work

My new boss had been treat me unfairly at work, she just hired her friend with 6 months exprience, to be my new supervisor.. I had over 7 yrs of expriences.

This new supervisor asked me to performed an illegal act already !

What should I do????

How do I re-acting???

Do I need to confront them both???


Advise!   PLEASE



July 24, 2007, 4:40 pm CDT

Full Time Worker

A full time worker


      "Sarah You have to just take it with a grain of salt!" - This is what my supervisor told me when I first started my job at Nucomm. This is a call centre I work at and we must deal with alot of angry and somtimes polite people.

       I had a customer call in one day and call me every name in the book because they hadnt paid their bill? I was very upset because I have a past that has made me angry towards people who yell and scream at me, especailly when it is not my fault. I am more than happy to halp people and I can deal with upset people, but when it comes to them directing their problems to me and placing the blame on me, thats when I cant deal with it.

     Anyways, since then I have just thought about her voice in the back of my head saying "Sarah just take it with a grain of salt" They dont know me, they never will.... Just shows how difficult it is to make a living sometimes and the things you must deal with along the way.. This article is for people who work at a call centre or that have to work with people all day, mostly irate ones! lol



July 24, 2007, 4:53 pm CDT

Stress At Work

Quote From: atwork1

My new boss had been treat me unfairly at work, she just hired her friend with 6 months exprience, to be my new supervisor.. I had over 7 yrs of expriences.

This new supervisor asked me to performed an illegal act already !

What should I do????

How do I re-acting???

Do I need to confront them both???


Advise!   PLEASE



Hey there,

   Is there anyone that is higher up from your boss? I dont think it was fair for her too hire her friend for a big position when you have been there for 7 years. That is rediculious. There is deffenetly someone hire up then your boss that you should be able to report her too. And that is a personal choice if you want to confront them both, but if you think it will get you into trouble with them then dont. Write back and tell me what you think!



HummingBird here too help!

July 28, 2007, 3:34 pm CDT

sister's work stress crossed over into home

Hi all!  This is a work/career related situation that has to do with my 30 year old sister.  About  a year and a half ago, she started showing real bad signs of stress at home from work.  She started disliking her job more and more and would constantly call my mom at home to talk about how much she hated her job and was under a lot of emotional stress.  She was at her breaking point.  Try as she might, she stuck with the job for a month or two more, used up some much needed vacation time and tried to recoop at home.  But upon going back to work, the stress just started all over again.  She finally quit her job and has been home with mom and dad ever since.


She no longer sees the need to get a new job, nor does she want to be bothered about anything career or school based to try another field.  My mom and I also noticed that she has emotionally and socially gone backwards in time.  She doesn't clean up after herself, her room is a huge mess, and she has started bossing everyone in the family around, including mom and dad.  Whenever one of us approaches her about getting a new job, she either ignores us or tells us to be quiet.  I fear that she is in a bad way.  She has become too comfortable and my parents and I have given up on encouragement and support.  She just doesn't have her priorities in check anymore and frankly she doesn't care.  Her respect for family members is very low.  Does anyone have any suggestions on what I can do to help her out, or at least help my parents to deal with this situation?  I've given her hints to job-related websites and I ask her on a  daily basis how the search is going with no response.  I even suggested to my parents to give her a motive of "90 days to get a job or you're kicked out of the house," but they don't want to oust her.  The whole household is an emotional wreck.  Please help.  Thanks.


"at ends rope" in connecticut

August 17, 2007, 6:01 pm CDT

My boss hates me.......urrrgggggggg

 I have a boss whom I have been working with for the past couple of years and her constant"nagging" is really pissing me off! If there is no reason, she will find one.


 The problem I have is this, She is the boss, how do I get her off my back, without hurting my reputation at work(very clicky, if you know what I mean)? Hell nevermind my reputation, my credability???????/



any advice would be appreciated ty

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