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Topic : 03/29 Cougars and Sugar Daddies

Number of Replies: 1371
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Created on : Friday, November 03, 2006, 01:01:10 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 11/08/06) When it comes to dating, they say age is just a number. But what happens when the man is more than two decades older than his girlfriend, or the woman is 15 years older than her young lover? Forty-year-old Sanjay is a wealthy cosmetic surgeon who met 18-year-old Jacqueline on the Web site They’ve only been together four months but are already talking marriage. Sanjay’s friend, Mike, is convinced that Jacqueline will put him right in the poorhouse! Is there a chance that Sanjay has found true love, or is Jacqueline just in it for the money? Then, 24-year-old Ryan is engaged to Angela, a woman 15 years his senior. Ryan’s friend, Donovan, fears that Angela is alienating Ryan from his buddies. Will Ryan have to choose between his college friends and his soon-to-be wife? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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May 25, 2007, 12:56 am CDT

Girls, lets pull it together



What about his comment about 'nearly all countries except America would encourage a 40 yr old man to be with an 18 yr old girl'.


I say bring on some numbers/places/percentages pal!!! And whats more, tell me if these girls are empowered, educated, respected, fulfilled AND NOT OBJECTIFIED. These relationships are about control and destruction of confidence. Trust me, I was in one. I went from A+ grades to thinking I was absolutely worthless in terms of a career. Luckily I woke up, but am still working on regaining my old sense of self worth.


Nothing makes me more sick to the stomach than the 'man saves woman' scenario. The fact that Sanjay truly believes he knows what women want shows how out of touch some men still are. 


Dr Phil has made a mistake in putting the two cases on the same show- they are NOT equal. Let me explain why; the proportion of old man/young girl relationships far outway old women/young guy ones. It's like saying that in order to deal with prostitution we need to equally target women for going to male prostitutes (1%) on the same pages as men going to female prostitutes (99%). Does this make sense? Hardly.


Thats all I have to say.





May 25, 2007, 9:35 am CDT

03/29 Cougars and Sugar Daddies

The only opinion i have is that from the limited insight into the blonde girl's character, i find it difficult that she would be able to hold a long term relationship with ANYONE, given her behaviour and character traits that have been presented. 

Its a pity that Sanjay who seems like a nice guy, has been so scarred by his wife's death that he's resorted to an emotionally void relationship.  I think he's been taken advantage of due to this.  Having said that, if he can afford his lifestyle, and never deals with the trauma of his wife's death, that this is the level of intimacy he is capable of, then i guess it'll have the same chance of working as any othe relationship.

As for the older woman and 24 year old guy, this may sound really crude, but i think the 24 year old is happy given he probably doesnt rate himself as capable of pulling many other girls his age.  So good for them as well if it works out, i hope whatever happens her children dont get affected by whats going on or what might happen later.

July 10, 2007, 11:03 am CDT

03/29 Cougars and Sugar Daddies

Sanjay and his dipsy little child-girlfriend are both of the same stock. I just didn't get why his friend went on such attack on her, when he needs to let Sanjay look at himself and what his motives truly are.


One is after attention, objects and money, and the other one has an illusionary imagination that he is more virile and more man with an underaged girlfriend half his age. Truth is, to society he looks desperate and ridiculous. I say: they have chosen to exploit each other. Let them be responsible for destroying each other too. It will never last. There is no real love there.


February 13, 2008, 6:33 pm CST

03/29 Cougars and Sugar Daddies

Ok, I have to say something here. First of all, I do not understand why people would hook up for a relationship based on age and money, and it sounds just as shallow to me as it does to anyone else. However, life is short and if these two people are having a good and honest time together then that’s their business. I don’t know why they agreed to go on the show, I’d say it was an error in judgement. The guy’s friend seems to have a serious control/temper problem. The comment made about her driving his deceased wife’s car, well my parents drove a felon’s car for a while because it was on sale. Many things are second-hand, and not always ideally so. She’s crying because she has emotions, and some people, believe it or not, do carry their heart on their sleeve. And as for this bias against relationships with an age difference, it has no basis. A relationship is based on love, connection and honesty. It is not for us to judge their relationship, nor is it for Dr. Phil. This couple doesn’t have a perfect setup, but they’re a lot happier than most. I do think they’re both rather shallow, but I think the people judging them are being shallow also. I’m glad they’re happy together and I wish them all the best.

May 2, 2008, 1:09 pm CDT

Cougars and Sugar Daddies

 Very interesting. ...  No double standard but we talk here only about the women who date a younger man.  What about if this young man want to start a family ?  To have some children ?  Do you think that this woman can give him that ?   At least, when it is the opposite - e.g  young woman old man - the woman can start a family.  Does not mean that I am agree with that but it is a fact.

I have a 27 years old son ..... and I will really upset to see him dating a woman older than him.  Maybe a difference (5-8 years) .... but no 20 or more !    I would like for him to have a family  ..... What about your son, Dr Phil ?  Will you accept this ?

This is my opinion :)
May 2, 2008, 5:25 pm CDT

Crazy old women

I am 62. I prefer women who are more or less my age. I have nothing in common with significantly younger women. I am in good shape financially and physically – 6’ 190#.


I dated extensively for a couple of years. The criticisms that the women on your show had about men are almost identical to those that older men have of older women. I got tired of dating emotionally and financially bankrupt, fat, dead gray cell, old women, who wanted a cruise director rather than an equal relationship of substance. Call me shallow.


If you are attractive and /or have money, an older man or woman can find a young person to have a relationship with. Young men like older women because they are ‘easy’ sexually, experienced or not, gullible, and can afford to pay. (Having had sex two thousand times in the Presbyterian position, hoping he will ‘do it quickly’ is not experience. It is boring, although you can use the time to plan tomorrow’s dinner menu.) Similarly, young women like older men who are in a position of power, attractive, and/or well heeled. The relationships for the old partner is ego and sex based. Believing otherwise is delusional. The relationship for the young partner is pretty much legalized prostitution.


It is cheaper and easier to hire an ‘escort’, if my ego demands that I have an attractive girl/woman as a dance partner or dinner or bed companion. You get what want the way that you want with a professional. Dating is expensive, time consuming, and more often than not a painful unfulfilling experience.


On the whole old women and old men have different hormone drivers. Their estrogen and testosterone hormone levels flip flop. Is it little wonder that an old man’s sexual interest is about the same as a 35 year old house wife’s (I have a headache) and the old woman’s is about the same as a 35 year old man’s (Let’s go to bed and work up a real appetite?)


July 12, 2008, 7:09 pm CDT

I was married to a man 21 yrs older

It seems strange to me that women get such a bad name if they go out with younger men.


Power is a great attraction for both sexes as is youth for powerful humans.


Women today, are much  more like men now than they used to be, in that they have powerful positions at work or are wealthy because of their own business.  This makes them attractive to younger men.  These men see them as just as attractive as younger women see older and successful men.


What is not attractive about an older person who lives well and does interesting things and is well educated.  They have confidence and experience and are calmer and very interested in the younger person.  This younger person represents a fresh face with a warm personality, who is not filled with anger at the failure of their life, and trying to juggle children and an ex-spouse.


For an older successful person, the younger person is very beautiful not only physically but in a certain innocence that the older person has lost.


For them there is joy in giving to the younger person, who really appreciates the gifts.  Who does not like to give and do things for someone who looks so happy.


People think of only the sexual aspect of this spring /autumn relationship, but that is just one part of it.


It is the promise of future seeing this young person and for the young person it is all the things they can learn from and older more established person.


This has always happened, but it is far more frequent now as women have changed so much over the last 20 yrs.


My present husband is five years younger, than I, and I find that just right.  Not only is he younger, but he looks younger than his age.  I still look at him with awe, and think how handsome he is and how beautiful his skin is..  He is obviously very smart and I certainly am not his older wife, telling him what to do.


If I were not with him, then I think, I would look for his age or younger, as that is the age I find attractive, even though I am a grand mother of three, I do not feel like a grand mother, although I love being one.


I worried at first he would tire of me and look for a younger women, but I do not worry about that anymore.


So I would say to all of you who think that an older woman with a younger man is disgusting and foolish, the young man is not thinking that.  He is happy to have a powerful women at his side who is crazy about him in bed.  What man would not want that? He would not give this older woman up easily for an insecure younger women who did not enjoy him so much in bed, and was very needy, and judgemental!

July 15, 2008, 5:29 pm CDT

Over sensative about child molesters

As I was molested as a child, I am sensitive to other children being molested.  I think that it is better to be over cautious than to be blind to family members, male or female molesting their children or close family members.


I think that the grand mother on your show, was right to be cautious and to notice new behaviour  in her grand son.


The possible new step father was not a molester, but I think all women who spend time with new male partners should always be aware that these men could mistreat their children.


Human males like other male animals actually do not want to raise another man's child, in their subconscious.  I think they can tend to be more violent with a son who is another man's child.


There is always a danger of any new man in the house, and all women should be very careful who they decide to live with if it is not the father of their small children.


AS a mother and a grand mother, even I have met a few children, I just did not like.  A previous boyfriend of mine had the sort of boy I could not stand.  I knew that we could never have been happily married, if I had married him and had to put up with his spoilt son.  I could never have grown to love his son.


Just because one has chemistry with the father or mother does not mean one will learn to love their children, and it is wrong to enter into a marriage or partnership with a person who has a child that one knows one can never love, but worse than that, actively dislike. The man or woman who is the parent, loves their child and to deceive them just to marry them is really unfair on that child.


What had happened to the biological father in this show?


It is not just men who mistreat or molest children.  It is less common for women to molest children and their own children, but it happens.  Just like women murder their own children.


So vigilance is the best safety for one's child.  The woman today who did not believe her daughter was molested, may be right, as there is a very real danger of a step child accusing their step parent of molestation as that is something they know will ruin the life of that step parent.  Many mother's deny their children when they accuse their actual biological father as it would mean the break up of their marriage.


There is far more in play that meets the eyes of people who have not lived in a home where molestation has taken place.

November 28, 2008, 1:04 pm CST

03/29 Cougars and Sugar Daddies

Sorry to necro this discussion but this show was aired here in Australia yesterday (28/12/08).  I would be fascinated to know if Sanjay and Jacqueline are still dating, did they marry?. are they divorced yet?  She came across as a silly, immature, petulat 18yr old basking in the attention of an older, grieving, vulnerable yet controlling man.   On balance I think they probably deserve each other.  I can understand why Sanjay's friend Mike was so frustrated and angry watching the trainwreck unfold but in the end it's none of his business.  All he can do is wait to pick up the pieces when Sanjay realises his mistake. 

January 21, 2009, 11:53 pm CST

Say No to Sugar Daddie / Daddy Websites

I was on for about 6 months.  I would not recommend it to anyone.  They are older men, looking to f*** young, naive girls.  Because they are successful and intelligent, it is very easy for them to manipulate the ladies and tell them everything they want to hear.  It's believable, because the old guys stress how they are older, ready to settle down, too busy, etc.  But, it's all a lie.  They are no better than a horny teen, but use their success as leverage as to why they shouldn't be judged as the typical young horny frat boy. 


The first one I dated is a doctor in Florida , we'll call him DrD - let's just say around the Boca Raton, Wellington, Ft. Lauderdale, Del Rey area.  Very handsome, never married, really sweet, thoughtful, kind, went out of his way.  Talked to him for a few months as he pursued me and convinced me that he was honestly interested in me. He flew out to see me, after months of talking on a daily basis. Everything was as good as it was on the phone. He said he was (and I was) already emotionally attached.  He made plans with me of trips and made me a part of his decisions in work and personal matters. We had sex, and after *ZAP!*, he faded away.  He would pretend he was still 100% into me, but not call, and the whole time he was logged into Sugardaddie - obviously seeking the next victim(s).


After him, I spoke with quite a few other guys from Sugardaddie.  I was just trying to understand guys on the site.  They were all successful, older, and all single.  What I realized, is all these older, successful men have all the same lines and lies.  They use the same excuses.  I didn't bother to meet up with any of them, because I was aware of their scheme now.  They plan trips and want to fly ladies everywhere and anywhere.  Of course, it's to get laid, and because they have money, it's like handing a younger woman a dollar to have sex with her.  After sex the girl never gets another call, or they f*** her for a few months until they get tired of her.  They all play the same game, and they're all trying to f*** as many ladies on the site that they can.  These are the men who have put their careers before love, and are so old, that love is foreign to them and they are only after what they've grown used to - sex with young women.  The men here are confirmed bachelors for life.  They don't know how to care about anyone but themselves, but they are very convincing of their faux feelings for whomever they are hunting down at the moment.  There is a reason why a man in his 40's, 50's, 60's on up are on websites such as and the rest - it's to hook up with girls based on the woman's desire to date a man with money.  These guys know the website is completely to their advantage, and besides, where else would it be okay for an old guy to pick up on young girls?  This site is made for the convenience of older rich men, who are and always will be panty chasers.


There were a few guys who were very persistent about their interest in me, and each asked me to pick my dream trip.  I told each one that if I go on the trip, we would NOT be having sex, since I didn't know them.  Guess what?  After weeks to months of pursuing me, as soon as I said NO SEX, I never heard from them again! LoL!


If you don't mind putting out for a few hundred dollars worth of shopping or taking a trip with some old guy, so he can bang you, then sign up for this site.  99.9% you are NOT going to find love.  The men on these types of sites are aggressive businessmen, and ladies are just something for them to stick their d*cks into.  I work hard and can afford my own trips and shopping sprees.  I was on the site, because I was hoping to find someone who is consumed by work, as I am, and is too busy to find love in the real world.  Unfortunately, sugar daddy sites are not meant for love, they're meant for sex transactions!  Yes, there are a lot of 'professional' women on the site too!  The men have told me about the escorts on there.  Anyway, the men on one site, are the same exact men you'll find on the others!  Yes, I know, I looked!  They have multiple daddy accounts.  You know they're a sad bunch, since they're mostly older and yet, they all have Myspace and Facebook accounts with their shirts off!  If you're old enough to be a grandfather and have shirtless photos on sites like Myspace, that tells everyone how into cradle robbing you really are!  The emotional strain these womanizers put on you, is not worth the stress and aggrevation.

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