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Topic : 08/07 Big Burden

Number of Replies: 365
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Created on : Friday, April 21, 2006, 10:21:06 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 04/27/06) Morbid obesity changes the dynamic of two entire families … and tears them apart. DeeDee weighs over 700 pounds and hasn't left her house in more than a year. She has become a burden to her friends and family by constantly demanding their help and company. Is DeeDee ready to get real and make a change, or will she continue to blame her weight gain on other circumstances? Also, her children explain why they resent their mother and feel hostage to her demands. Then, MaLynn is only 14 years old, but she already weighs 419 pounds, and her obesity is causing problems in school. Her mother, Shari, admits she can't say no to her daughter when it comes to food. Dr. Phil shows MaLynn how she can easily lose 86 pounds, and he gets this mother-daughter team to work together to save their relationship and their lives. Talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.

More August 2006 Show Boards.

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April 27, 2006, 7:09 am CDT


Quote From: lillskr

Hopefully Dr Phil can give help to the obese 14 year old.  She's so young and heading in such a horrible direction.  Because of her age, hopefully it'll be a success story down the road   

NOT "Hopefully a success story!"  


She WILL be a success story. I guarantee it.  


She's smart, ambitious and she wants to be healthy and happy. That girl has what it takes to succeed!!! I cannot wait to see her at this same time next year. They'll be less to admire, but that's even better!  



April 27, 2006, 7:34 am CDT

04/27 Big Burden

Quote From: lindaw67

If it is, according to some people, a genetic thing then why is it that in Europe people aren't as large as the Americans. Only in the last few years people in Europe are becoming larger than ever, but rarely you see someone as large as I see them often in the States. I do think it is more a problem in lifestyle.  

I think the main reason of becoming obese is eating unhealthy fast food and no excersise. People don't take time anymore to eat  and prepare meals together. My American neighbours for instance never cooked a proper meal (fresh vegetables, homegrilled chicken, fruits; sometimes they didn't even know how to prepare them or what they looked like raw), never ate together( wow you REALLY always have breakfast and dinner together at the table??) and drove their children to the tenniscourt ( 10 minute walk tops) and back home (after a stop at Wendy's for dinner).  In supermarkets you have to search for the vegetables and fruitsection (way back in the store, in Europe the first thing you see when you enter the store) and you don't buy normal sized packages but kingsize(and believe me you finish them as fast as normal size).  

Unfortunately the Europeans more and more get into the "American" habits too and are becoming larger and larger.   

I'm not saying that in Europe everything is better but in this case you can clearly see the differences in lifestyle.  

I agree America has become very sedated and hate to use this term but lazy. Our children are the first generation in a long time that is actually predicted to die sooner then the previous generation because of obesity. It is a sad thing we may out live our children. The reasons behind their weight gain is they don't play outside like children once did they have video games and computers and are just plain lazy. Fast food all these greasy foods, sodas, and candy. It is a shame. We as a nation need to get off our lazy butts and get moving and stop feeding ourselves this poison. If someone is 20 pounds overweight but they are eating right, and moving and healthy then no problem but you can't be healthy when you weigh four and five hundred pounds or more.
April 27, 2006, 7:36 am CDT


boy do i recognize something the young girl said. she said im depressed because im fat and i eat because im depressed. been there done that and own quite a few tee shirts. im fifty years old, a registered nurse and 331lbs. as the kids grew up i grew out. the older they got the bigger i got. when my first bird flew the nest i gained fifty lbs. im pretty tall and have a heavy skeletal frame so i didnt worry at first. then i noticed that no matter what i did i wasnt losing it. as each one of my four flew out i picked up more and more weight. im an old fasioned southern cook and was still cooking like everyone was home. bad thing was i hate waste so id spend all week eating my leftovers. my husband was military and away a lot. now hes retired and working overseas. he has no problem with my weight and besides the fact that im a type two diabetic he tells me not to worry myself about it and it will get better. ive always been the house boss so no one dares tell me no. i have no energy. i work my butt off but thats because i love what i do. after work i collapse. no energy to do anything else. i joined curves and try to make it at least twice a week. the workouts are hard for me because i have no flexibility. but im trying. the more upset i get about it the more i gain. i will lose thirty pounds and put back on fifty. i dont know what else to do. my life is wonderful otherwise. the kids and grandkids are great. i love my husband dearly and he loves me. i dont know what to do. i totally sympathize with the ladies on the show. i wish them love luck and happiness. wish i had the courage and energy to even ask for more help. i feel defeated by this one thing. ive always been successful at whatever i want to do. not this. dosent help that im from a family full of hypertensive, overweight, diabetics. my fathers family is almost all diabetic, type one and two, and all overweight. so i do believe in genetics playing a part. God bless the ladies on the show. God bless dr. phil for his common sense and help.
April 27, 2006, 7:49 am CDT

Sometimes Illness Causes Obesity

I went to college for Medical Assistant and they explained where certain illness can lead to obesity. Diabetes is hereditary or can be caused by eating too much junk. I see now alot of kids are becoming overweight, getting hypertension and Diabetes Type 2. I blame it on having fast food restaurants on every block. Why do we need McDonald's every few blocks? If in the case that obesity is not hereditary or caused by illness, it is cause people need to get off their lazy butts and excercise. Quit eating so much and start walking, jogging, biking, join a health club, but do something besides sitting around playing video games or watching TV all day. Now, why do we need special parking for pregnant women?When I was expecting, the doctor told me that walking was a benefit to delivery. I had 2 boys and I am still slim, too. I am also 5'3 130 lbs and actually have people saying I'm too thin. I think I am about average.
April 27, 2006, 7:53 am CDT

People who laugh at others are just plain ignorant

Quote From: lgizmo1400

I understand what both of you are saying. You don't just gain 300lbs over night. It happens from being inactive. In 2000 I found out I was pregnant and quite my job because the environment was not healthy for me to be in during my prenancy. I ended up staying home and I am still a stay at home mom. Since then I have gained at least 100lbs since then, most was with my pregancy and I have not been able to loose it. I am a very active person I think. I just have a very crappy metablosim. I have thought about the gastric by pass surgery, but to me that is like cheating on a test it is taking the easy way if I can't loose it now whose to say after the surgery I won't gain it all back and then have had to go through this procedure for nothing. For me if I were to try to go to a gym I would be afraid of all the THIN people laughing at me while I was trying to work out. Being made fun of for trying to loose weight is not a motivativor.
I am a THIN person, but I don't laugh at other people. I think people who do are just ignorant. All of us have our shortcomings, as a Pastor told us at a funeral recently. Tihs is true that none of us are perfect.
April 27, 2006, 8:09 am CDT

Re: 04/27 Big Burden

Quote From: daylily42

It's amazing to me that the show hasn't even aired yet, but this board has already erupted into a witch hunt of the morbidly obese.  I'm so glad that those of you out there who have a pathological need to feel superior to someone can get this out of your systems.  Cheer up, folks:  At least there's still someone you can still openly hate. 


If this were a show about an anorexic woman on the brink of death, few if any of you would be saying that it is her own fault, or why can't she just think clearly about her situation and her health. 


I just hope that those of you who are on a mission to air their superiority to this woman and those in a similarly unhappy predicament will consider one point:  You have to eat.  You have to nourish your body.  It's impossible to go "cold turkey" on food except through a fasting diet, and those have been widely discredited.  Yes, gastric bypass surgery is on option, but it is a radical choice.  And unfortunately, without the behavioral commitment, even the benefits of gastric bypass surgery can be undone. 


Every person alive has made unwise choices.  Every person alive has done things contrary to common sense, good health, self-preservation.  This woman, whatever her story, has suffered for her choices.  She also seems to have blurred the line and inflicted those choices on her loved ones.  So please get over your self-righteous need to be superior to her and consider her as an individual who needs help in undoing the choices she has made.  Personally, I believe extreme obesity is a form of self-mutiliation, a desire to annihilate the self and anesthetize feelings with food.  I also believe this dynamic is very complex and can only be reversed with much commitment and care.  It's possible, but it's extremely difficult. 


And those of you who are fortunate enough not to have this problem should show some understanding and compassion, rather than using this message board as a place to air your hatred. 


As I was reading all of the comments, I was sad to see so many judgemental people.  They seem to be attacking real human beings maybe because they don't know what they don't know and have formed strong intolerances from what they don't know. 


I also believe that extreme obesity is a form of self mutilation and an attempt to keep people away.  I've read that over 70% of morbidly obese people have been sexually abused in childhood.  Habits form from these early years and become ingrained as a belief of who a person is.  It's a cycle formed of an event and the beliefs that we form from that event and and that we do what we "learn" because this becomes the true belief. 


Also, please don't forget that extreme over or under eating may stem from severe depression (chemical or situational).  Whatever the reason for the obesity, the person may need some extensive therapy and support to learn new beliefs and habits.    


Don't give up on people....any of them. 

April 27, 2006, 8:10 am CDT

04/27 Big Burden

why does junk food have to taste so damn good though? and why are some of the junk right on the "impulse" aisle at the grocery store while you are waiting on line? Too bad we can't just get rid of all the junk food and fast food places in this society. It wouldn't solve all the problems but it would help!! I know that's a very simplistic view and I know we shouldn't blame our problems on society and we should be able to control ourselve,s but sometimes it is sooo hard to control yourself...
April 27, 2006, 8:12 am CDT

04/27 Big Burden

Quote From: lgizmo1400

I understand what both of you are saying. You don't just gain 300lbs over night. It happens from being inactive. In 2000 I found out I was pregnant and quite my job because the environment was not healthy for me to be in during my prenancy. I ended up staying home and I am still a stay at home mom. Since then I have gained at least 100lbs since then, most was with my pregancy and I have not been able to loose it. I am a very active person I think. I just have a very crappy metablosim. I have thought about the gastric by pass surgery, but to me that is like cheating on a test it is taking the easy way if I can't loose it now whose to say after the surgery I won't gain it all back and then have had to go through this procedure for nothing. For me if I were to try to go to a gym I would be afraid of all the THIN people laughing at me while I was trying to work out. Being made fun of for trying to loose weight is not a motivativor.
Hey if you are scared people at the gym will laugh at you, how bout getting a video to work out at home, then no one is watching. You can get a mat, video and a medicine ball. They aren't that expensive and you can do it in the comfort of your own home! :)
April 27, 2006, 8:41 am CDT

People who want rescued get help

Quote From: brandid


  •    Yes, I do believe that genetics do have some to do with obesity however; I am offended at the "boo-hooing" statement you have made here.  Yes, I was obese and I have lost 160 lbs and I have 40 lbs to go to get to my weight.  When I was morbidly obese I did not blame anyone else but myself.  I am the one who put the food in my mouth.  Yes, I had issues and I had to learn to deal with them differently but my familty was not yielding to my desires or helping create a lethargic existence.  My family DID encourage me to not eat so much, to go for walks, to exercise more, all of it.  I am the one who choose not to.  So how dare you judge people you do not even know!  You do not live their live and you do not know what they are going through every single second.  You are not in their minds, hearts and homes.  Until you know first hand maybe you should not talk about it at all.  And if you have been obese or you are obese then shame on you.  Do not judge families of or the obese because I GAURANDAMMTEEE that they are doing a much harder judging job on themselves than you ever could.  See you are part of the problem.  You see, it is people like you that make me sick!  Instead of talking junk maybe you could find a way to help instead of criticizing.  That would be a much better solution!!!  Obese people do not need RESCUEING they need people like you to leave them the hell alone!!
My point is that the people boo-hooing to me are the ones not getting help and I am glad these ladies are getting help from Dr.Phil. And I think it's wrong to make fun of obese people, I didn't judge them either. All I said was that her family is adding to the bad habits she has, which Dr. Phil so politely included, if you watched the show. She had a refrigerator in her room and everyone ate on her bed. That's not healthy for any of them. Sometimes also if you are made fun of about something (it could be anything in life), it will piss you off enough to do something about it. I'm not condoning making fun of anyone, but different things motivate different people in different ways. I hope I did piss you off and it made you so mad that you're ready to live differently and stop choosing to not try. I hope that you understand I'm not criticizing, I'm critiquing the attitude of not being willing and not doing better for your personal self and goals. And if people like yourself would stop judging yourself so harshly, then maybe the stress won't get to you so bad when other people say bad things and you will be able to overcome your problems. I have people who are hateful to me for no reason, but I recognize that I have to accept who I am and it only matters what God thinks, not the world. I hope you can stop the cycle of self-condemnation and grow up.
April 27, 2006, 8:51 am CDT

04/27 Big Burden

Quote From: grneyedtxn

Obesity and Genetics Posted: Jan. 1, 2005

Obesity is characterized by an excessively high amount of body fat or adipose tissue. This condition is common, but the condition varies from individual to individual.

At one end of the spectrum, a healthy weight can be attained by cutting down on certain foods, taking smaller portions, and embarking on a regimen of regular exercise. For individuals in this population, a moderate change in diet and exercise are the proper interventions because they work.

At the other end of the spectrum, there is another population of overweight people who do not respond as well to these interventions. Everyone knows someone who tries diligently to lose weight but who experiences limited success or loses weight only to gain it back over time. In fact, more than 80% of those who lose weight will gradually regain it unless a weight maintenance program is implemented over the long-term.   

What is different about these people compared to those who either stay thin or lose weight readily and keep it off with relatively minor lifestyle changes? One difference may be genetic risk factors that affect energy metabolism and result in an inborn susceptibility to gain weight.

Genetics as a risk factor for obesity
Although rare obesity syndromes caused by mutations in single genes have been described, by far the greatest proportion of obesity in humans is not due to mutations in single genes.

Genetic predisposition may not be health destiny, but studies indicate that inherited genetic variation is an important risk factor for obesity. Evidence from twin, adoption and family studies strongly suggests that biological relatives exhibit similarities in maintenance of body weight. Genetic factors also are beginning to be implicated in the degree of effectiveness of diet and physical activity interventions for weight reduction.

These genetic risk factors tend to be familial, but are not inherited in a simple manner; they may reflect many genetic variations, and each variation may contribute a small amount of risk and may interact with environmental elements to produce the clinical condition of obesity.

You can’t change your genes, but you can change your behavior
Does this mean that those with a susceptible genotype are destined to a life of futile efforts to achieve a healthy weight? This need not be the case. We can’t change our genes, but we can change our behavior.

Small victories in weight loss — often as little as 10% of total body mass — can result in positive effects on health and well-being, even if an ideal weight remains elusive. Also, the positive effects of regular physical activity include lower blood pressure and increased cardiorespiratory fitness even in people who are significantly overweight.

In the longer term, understanding the genetic variations that influence energy metabolism may help us to understand the underlying biological factors that affect weight gain and energy expenditure. Also, to recognize that obesity may be due to a metabolic condition rather than a flaw in character is important both for the people who are affected and for society as a whole.

The public health messages to prevent overweight emphasize a nutritious diet and daily physical activity. Many who follow this advice from the outset are able to maintain a healthy weight, even with a genetic susceptibility to gain weight.

However, these lifestyle interventions have a range of effectiveness, especially if obesity is already present. For people who are already overweight, the public health interventions aimed at the general population are not a complete solution. Insights from genetics and molecular biology in controlling appetite and activity may provide more effective therapies for treatment.

Source: Center for Disease Control and Prevention   

Causes of Morbid Obesity The reasons for obesity are multiple and complex. Despite conventional wisdom, it is not simply a result of overeating. Research has shown that in many cases a significant, underlying cause of morbid obesity is genetic. Studies have demonstrated that once the problem is established, efforts such as dieting and exercise programs have a limited ability to provide effective long-term relief.

Science continues to search for answers. But until the disease is better understood, the control of excess weight is something patients must work at for their entire lives. That is why it is very important to understand that all current medical interventions, including weight loss surgery, should not be considered medical cures. Rather they are attempts to reduce the effects of excessive weight and alleviate the serious physical, emotional and social consequences of the disease.   


Contributing Factors 
The underlying causes of severe obesity are not known. There are many factors that contribute to the development of obesity including genetic, hereditary, environmental, metabolic and eating disorders. There are also certain medical conditions that may result in obesity like intake of steroids and hypothyroidism.   


Genetic Factors 
Numerous scientific studies have established that your genes play an important role in your tendency to gain excess weight.   

  • The body weight of adopted children shows no correlation with the body weight of their adoptive parents, who feed them and teach them how to eat. Their weight does have an 80 percent correlation with their genetic parents, whom they have never met.
  • Identical twins, with the same genes, show a much higher similarity of body weights than do fraternal twins, who have different genes.
  • Certain groups of people, such as the Pima Indian tribe in Arizona, have a very high incidence of severe obesity. They also have significantly higher rates of diabetes and heart disease than other ethnic groups.


We probably have a number of genes directly related to weight. Just as some genes determine eye color or height, others affect our appetite, our ability to feel full or satisfied, our metabolism, our fat-storing ability, and even our natural activity levels.

Well everything you posted agrees with what I've said. Also, I was looking for the scientific studies themselves, not articles ABOUT the studies.

Thank you though.
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